Tupelo Honey

All I can think of is My Honey....

2012-02-03T12:35:00.001-05:00

Rest in peace, my love.

I love you, my honey

2012-01-23T10:36:00.002-05:00

It hits me when I least expect it. I'm here at work, typing away being oh-so-productive when suddenly the bottom drops out of my stomach: my honey is gone. I keep trying to wrap my mind around this reality that I will never see you again. The years stretch before me, endlessly dripping into the beyond, and all I can think of is - what will I do without you? To accept that all the plans we made, the anticipation of growing old together - it will never happen. I never get to hug you again, I never get to laugh with you. That concept just doesn't want to go down. I feel it stuck in my chest, and I try to swallow it up and accept it, but it remains like a fossilized lump in my throat. Oh, honey, I love you so much! Help me be strong today. <3

It's My Birthday Today

2011-12-28T15:34:00.001-05:00

Oh, comma, I love you!

2011-12-27T14:38:00.003-05:00

You know how there are little niggling things tickling the back of your mind that you think you should probably look up, but half the time when you've got a minute to do so, you can't remember what the heck all those myriad of things are??? Oh, no? Welcome to my life, then...

Well, I knocked one off the list today!

For the last several years, it has been a bugger of a brain-bracker that I compulsively use commas in compound sentences, seperating the first compound sentence from the second compound sentence. However, I have become increasingly aware that other people do not use this comma. Almost no one. But I continued to use it, thinking to myself that I never would have ever begun using it if it was wrong, now would I??!!

Apparently, I was right. I should be using it, and even better yet, when people don't use it, they are wrong! Oh, that made me so happy! Now, I'm not saying all my comma usage is right. I look at my commas in this little bloggery, and I have to say, I'm not sure half the time if they are right or not. But one thing I do know: I can use them in a compound sentence! Whoo-hoo!!!

The Trouble with FB

2011-12-27T10:07:00.003-05:00

Like many people oh-so-late-to-see-the-light, I am a recovering soul; yes, recovering from being sucked into the vortex of on-line social networks. As a recovering addict, I have had to force myself to abstain from such pleasures as reading my twitter feed, poking people on facebook and - in one of the biggest moments - I deleted my program on my iphone that automatically updated everyone and everything all at the same time. I don't read other people's posts, I rarely comment or post anything myself. Essentially, I have tried to disappear. Except for that whole deleting-my-account thing. I mean, hey, I've got a lot of pictures and memories wrapped up in all of that!

Since my self-enforced retirement from the online community, I have given some thought to why I felt the need to make this socially-sacrificing gesture, essentially removing myself from party invitations, birth and death notices, and all other general information about my friends and cohorts. What it boiled down to is very simply stated: I only have time in my life for people I truly care about. Perusing these websites not only diminishes the amount of time I can spend on people I truly care about, it distracts me with slogan-style statuses from people I actually don't know all that well and if the truth were known, I really don't care about very much at all. Not that I wish them ill, I just don't wish to see yet another status about a piece of food stuck to the side of their coffee cup or how their dog farted and it really smelled. Which really gets me thinking about what I want and why I want it: I want to know what the people I care about are doing - which can be counted in a number less than 30 - and I want to touch base with them and them only. So....I think I'm going on there and I'm going to clean house - and leave it only to the people I truly want to know drank out of a dirty coffee cup.

Yeah, I had a stroke and can't remember what I was going to write.

2011-12-22T11:26:00.000-05:00

I know you, my dearly faithful blog readers (who essentially don't exist), are deeply disappointed by the title of this blog. But, I felt I should share it as this is the one reason that you rarely see posts from me anymore. Here I am at work with a slight lull in my day and suddenly had a burst of inspiration for a new blog post. Excitedly, I logged in already beginning to compose my new literary piece in my head. But then - oh, distraction of distractions - I see my brother's post and begin reading his posts....about five minutes into it I think, oh, yeah, I was going to write a post! So I go to write it and - poof - it's gone. Empty. Blank. Not a primrose of a memory of what it was I thought would be so exciting to write.....and so you get another vacuous nothing of a post. Hmph!!!!!!!

Perhaps one day I will be able to retain my train of thought long enough to write extemporaneously....until then....harumphicolispism!!!!!!!!

My honey

2011-12-09T15:51:00.000-05:00

I just have to tell you - the general world out there - that I have probably the best human being in the world as *my husband*. I'm not saying that to brag, and I'm not saying that to butter him up. It's just the darn truth. No matter how you measure out what a good person truly is - no matter what criteria you use - he will rate at the top of your list, too. He's truly the best human being I know, bar none, and I love him more than my flattened personality could ever, every express. He saved my life, my childrens' lives and the lives of many other people too numerous to count by being the good, honest, hard working, truly inspiring human being he is. At this time of year when we are thinking of giving things to each other - and even about the things we may get - I realize that there is nothing I could ever give that means so much as what that man gives every day. He is the love of my life, and I pray that his influence makes me a better person each and every day.

Doing it for myself

2011-10-23T19:19:00.001-04:00

About six years ago - or was it seven? - I quit college just short of my two year degree. By "just short" I mean by 22 credits. Even still, I could get those 22 credits fairly quickly. I remember Brian Hosticka took 24 credits one semester prior to transferring to a four year university. Last time I saw him was at the court house prior to some court case he was working on. As a lawyer. So I guess those deeply mediocre grades he got that semester didn't hurt him too badly. I mean hey, he finished. I have A's on my transcript. About one A for every class I dropped. I'm thinking deeply mediocre grades on a completed degree a far better accomplishment than my few A's and many, many withdraws.

So I'm heading back this winter, taking six credits, considering that the likely outer limit of my ability while working full time. I'm also taking the last two required classes for my Associates degree. After that, I'll have 16 credits to fill of whatever I want to take. Not too bad, I'm thinking...wish me luck that I can still retain newly-learned knowledge after my stroke. If not, this could be a deeply painful failure. Good luck to me!!!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Hello, Blogger, Long Time-No See!

2011-03-30T09:15:00.004-04:00

I said recently on that little comment on the post one-down on the list here that I don't care who reads my blog; I just write because it is IN me to write - or some such nonsense. Well...that's not entirely true. I write because I love to have people read my blog and post comments. For a long, long, looong time I did the FB hop like the little bunny-bunny I am, reading and commenting and genuinely irritated at most everything other people put on their FB wall. It lacked any real sense of accomplishment for me. Oh, I would post exciting little tidbits and wait with bated breath until *someone* posted a comment and then, within 30 seconds, I would respond. Then wait once more with bated breath for more comments.... Stupid. Not fulfilling. And I would always put such stupid statuses on there - for example, see the stupid status I posted a month or more ago happily plastered on my blog wall (look to the right). See what I mean???

One thing I did like about FB, though, was when my girls' friends wanted to friend me. I loved that. I thought it was so deviilishly clever of me to have *their* friends as *my* friends because then I could see what *they* were putting on *their* wall!!! Stupid. All it really did was show me what is obvious to most well-actualized parents: kids are kiddishly posturing their version of adulthood exhaustively on FB. And quite irritatingly, too. I used to get pretty hyped up if I saw something upsetting on there. Now I realize that - like my own self - the kids are putting stuff up there they barely put together into an actualized thought, so why bother? I mean, do we REALLY want to see the random thoughts plucked out of the heads all around us? Not really. Not me, that's for sure. If I want a vision of random thoughts, I all I have to do is listen to my own!

Anyhoo, it's good to see you. Love-love-love!!

Tweet.....300 and Counting

2011-01-15T13:38:00.001-05:00

I just saw that I had published 299 blogs. This one equals 300. Holy cats alive! That's less than one a day for a year. And I've had my blog for like 5 or 6 years. Hmm...I'm thinking that's rather tankopulous.

In other news, I've been largely following my diabetic diet and exercising and so far I've lost about 9 pounds. Whippidee-dee. I would love to say I've lost 20 or 30, but alas! Only 9. I've discovered it is really hard to lose weight when you are a diabetic. Sucky freaking genetics. Sigh.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

A Big Step for Posterity

2010-12-02T19:43:00.001-05:00

UPDATED: Well, I deleted the FaceBook icon from my iPhone. Why, you ask? Because unless I get my Diabetes under control, I will die early. Like maybe within a decade. But how does that relate to FB? Mmmmm, it doesn't really.

But what it does relate to is the amount of time I spend dinking around on it instead of exercising or writing on my blog or cooking healthy food instead of eating another Toaster Strudel (ooooh, the strawberry cream cheese.....mmmmmmm). Ok, you get the idea. This obviously not going to be easy. But I do hope for better days.

UPDATE: I've spent the evening working quite extensively on a food plan and found the *best* iPhone app for Diabetes control; it's called Diabetes Buddy which is a rather unfortunate name. However, it kicks the effeminate ass out of the other apps I've tried over the past couple years. The only thing this app does not do is tell me how many calories I've burned on my workout. Other than that, it tracks EVERYTHING- even how much water I drank today! And it has the best food database I've seen so far - and I'm talking I've had probably about 6 or 7 various programs with food databases! I am thrilled to the max. Now all I have to do is exercise and eat right tomorrow. And take my medicine. And be good. Whew, it'll be a chore with or without my new app! ;)

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Hunting Target

2010-11-16T17:16:00.005-05:00

Once upon a time, we moved through the world around us without fear of noxious gas clouds on subways or gunmen lurking along the highway and even allowed our kids to go to school without the latest bullet proof jacket. But we live in a different world now. Whether it is the Islamist who may be secretly planning the next bio-terrorist event while giving us our change for coffee at the gas station or the quiet friend from a troubled family our kids bring home from school, we are faced with possible - and terrifying - threats to our security every day.

I remember in my bioethics class in college studying possible threats to our society and to what extent we would be willing to accept security trespasses to (almost) guarantee security, safety and most of all, not having to worry. Would we accept security cameras? Body searches? Secret surveillance? And ultimately, here we are all these years later debating the real question: what is the price we are willing to pay for the needful sense of security that enables us to snuggle in bed, smile as we send our kids off to school and drive to work unscathed?

The answer to this question is determined by the extent we have smelled danger lurking outside our own door. I lived in Tulsa, Oklahoma on April 19, 1995. It was around 9 o'clock, and I was heading over to the executive secretary's office to ask her a question. I walked in and instantly knew something was wrong. The President and Vice President of our company were tautly standing next to her desk and each person stared intently at a radio: The Alfred P Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City had just exploded. In utter terror we stood listening as horrific reports of the chaos and destruction as people ran for help, ran for safety, ran for friends, family, coworkers....just ran. Ditto the morning of September 11, 2001. I stood watching the news in our lunch room with the President and Controller of our company, wondering, et tu, Brute?

To me it all feels pretty darn close. Too close. So I am willing to pay for my unterrorized freedom by inconvenience, whether it is being scanned and people seeing my fat rolls or walking through the scanners at the county building. I don't want to be shot, I don't want people I love to be shot. I don't even want people I don't like to be shot. And for that, I'll pay the price.

Ahhh, finally!!

2010-11-14T11:14:00.001-05:00

For those of you vain enough (dare I say it?) to use the location finder in BlogPress blogging app on the iPhone, please note: it doesn't freaking work! After weeks (or days....) of trying to get it OFF the blog I innocently tried to write a few weeks (or days...) ago, I finally had to just delete BlogPress off my phone and reload it, CAREFUL to make sure I TURNED OFF that option for my blog posts! You may note that I have used this feature in the past successfully. Alas, it was not to happen again and resulted in many unfulfilling moments in which I could have been blogging but instead spent 5 minutes saying "OK" to the continually repeating message that it couldn't find my location. Humbug!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

The word of the day is....

2010-11-08T13:52:00.003-05:00

Ah, why is it that life is so wretchedly demandingly tiredly work???? I do believe I shall have to take a nap at my desk just to clear out all the darn thinking I did this morning. If only life as an adult could be as excitingly random and freakishly fun as being a child....long bike rides, traipsing my Barbie through the grass, letting my guinea pig Skipper run around in the yard, playing endless rounds of my made-up ball game where I would throw it against the wall and have to get it when it bounced off....these were the chores life had for me then. Sigh....

Another Fine Day

2010-10-28T17:04:00.001-04:00

Truly, madly, deeply I long to write here every day, filling your moments with joy as you trip gayly through my mental meanderings. Imagine the sheer bliss of experiencing the bulwark of my ever-burgeoning mental processes! Oh, joy, how it brightens my soul, and how it will brighten yours! Too bad I can't think of a freaking thing. Thanks, stroke, you suck royal jelly balls of phlegm!

Tune in tomorrow, I may be able to do better. Sigh.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:E Lakewood Blvd,Holland,United States

Slow long, good night

2010-10-19T07:59:00.002-04:00

What the heck, I go to bed, and before I know it, the alarm goes off about 3 hours before I am actually ready to get up. So, here I am at BK hating myself for the 3,000 calories I am about to eat and the subsequent blood sugar of 375. But hey, another day, another dollar. Work awaits!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:Bk in holland

I did it, I did it, I did it!!!!!!

2010-10-18T16:09:00.004-04:00

Omg, I'm crying, literally CRYING because I have not been able to get into my blog and write for MONTHS because I changed the log in and couldn't remember what it was and I've been through 49 different web pages entering every possible email address I've ever had (and a few I don't think I ever had!) trying to remember what the freaking log in here was!!!!! I literally cried at lunch today thinking my blog and I were never to be joined together again, cast asunder for evermore! BUT NO!!!!! Goodness has prevailed and I am - yet again - Bunnyjo Georg. YAY!!!!!! :)

Reading...

2009-11-06T23:22:00.001-05:00

I am reading a lot which is sort of cheating on my getting better from my stroke. My Speech Tx said I should stop every so many pages and recall what has happened. Well, right now I am reading Little Dorrit by Charles Dickens and it is loooooong. But not only that, a normal Chs Dickens book has prorbably a dozen or so main characters that you must keep straight. This book however has probably twice that number and maybe as many as 30. So I thought I'd try to read something else bur nothing else works. The great thing about wahat I am reading is that every time I "open" my book (it is on my iPod) I can't remember where I am, who's talking and why. I remember many of the main characters but then again there are so many I don't remember that I've given up trying to keep track and everytime I read it is like a little story and although I have a general idea of what is going on with Little Dorrit and Mr. Clennam (name?) who are the main people, everyone else just is ... I don't know. Just a lot of people.

So, what are you reading?

-- Posted from my iPhone

Put Blogger on my iPhone

2009-11-05T17:47:00.001-05:00

I've been a very bad girl because I haven't been blogging but that is mostly because I don't use my computer at all right now (and obviously don't go to work). So I put a program on my iPhone so I can keep the blog updated. This is boring, I know. Sorry about that. I will write more and be interesting next time.

-- Posted from my iPhone

Ho-ly Crap

2009-11-03T14:56:00.003-05:00

On September 11th I had a stroke (yeah, Sept 11, can you believe it?!?) Then I had another one a week after getting out of the hospital. I was in the hospital a week each time and then had to go back to the hospital to correct my heart hole which caused all the strokes to begin with. Then had bleeding and all that stuff so back to the hospital. And it has sucked, all except the part when I originally had the stroke because everything was sooooo funny. Unfortunately, that was a sign of the stroke. So it went away. And then everything has continually gotten ugly.

The good news is - well, sorta good news - is that I don't have any of the physical characteristics typically associated with a stroke. My second stroke had some but because it was only a TIA (ONLY), they went away very quickly, like within a couple days. The bad news is the stroke was in my thallamous (I can no longer spell). It's a place in the brain that controls all of your cognitive thinking, history, what you feel and all that kind of stuff. My husband rattles off the list but I always forget. Anyway, it's basically anything to do with what you think and your personality. I was talkative at first and laughed a lot but when people kept looking at each other weird I got quiet and have been pretty quiet ever since. I don't chit chat like i used to and I mostly just think of things to myself. The bad news is, when I do talk it is usually because I'm frustrated and I'm not nice, in fact, I'm a rotten horrible person. I REALLLLLLLLY don't like that. It makes me very angry, which I suppose is a stupid response to being a bitch. Ce ca. (Spelling, anyone?)

So, Chris just came back and I'm going to go real quick, but I just thought I'd say what-the-hell and cherry ho or whatever. Bye for now.

5 Years and Counting

2009-07-02T15:31:00.002-04:00

Glancing at my blog log I noticed that I've been blogging for 5 years now. Wow, has it really been that long? On the rare rare occassion that I read back over my years of scribbling and bibbling, I've come across some gems, things I am very proud of. Other things have great potential if I took the time to edit them. And then there are things I'd rather not read. Poorly written sign posts of where I was at that time. Bad company.

Now that life is less hectic with the girls out of school and nearly finishing the major portions of remodeling the house, I'm thinking I might go back and start weeding out the garden, picking a few floral specimens for the reading public at large. Who knows, I might hit a few homers.

Mixed metaphors, anyone?

Holy Shitoly

2009-07-01T11:11:00.006-04:00

There is this guy who works at my company and he is the VP of Engineering. Right off the bat he didn't like me. I was too aggressive and what the heck was I doing asking him this question or that question. My boss went to bat for me (baseball analogies?) saying I was doing what my position required and that I had not crossed any lines...or hit any fouls (ugh). Even still, I learned to mind my P's and Q's with him and try to stay out of his....ballpark as much as possible. (Or should I say stay off his base - enough with the baseball analogies!)

Keep in mind this is a guy who outright verbally abuses his female engineer. He is quite buddy-buddy with the engineer I work with who is a very passive male and let's his barbed little comments go by with no reaction. Considering what a dick he is, I just ignored his attitude and continued to do my job in spite of him (with recent cut backs I know he would have loved to see me cut, too).

Fast forward to last week. I needed to schedule a production launch meeting for a new product - a very critical product I may say. He was in charge of setting up production. I call him and ask when he would be available to meet this week. He said Friday. Um, I said, we will be on vacation for 4th of July that Friday. He snapped, too bad! and hung up on me. Whew, was I pissed. Later I cooled off and found out he was waaaay behind on setting up production and that is why he blew up at me. The thing though about the incident that really bothered me though was that I had always promised myself I would never let him talk to me in a degrading manner and that if he ever did, I would say, hey, that's innappropriate. So, what did I do? I cowered like a beaten dog and worst of all, my mind was blank as to what I could say to him about it. So, yeah, I cooled off but I was still a little pissed.

Ok, so today he walks into my office twice looking for my engineer. First time I said, he didn't tell me where he was going. Two minutes later Dick walks in again and asks about the engineer. I say that I honestly don't know. No answer and I hear the door shut. I say very loudly, I guess I'm talking to thin air! and then say quietly under my breath Dick! 10 seconds later he begins rumaging through my coworkers cubicle and I realize he had heard me!!! OMG, I got so scared. He could get me fired for this! However, the logical side of my brain says bring it on, dick! I'd just love to see him complain about something I said when he's been verbally abusing people for years - something I've witness first hand on many occassions. Plus, he has a habit of ignoring me when I speak, so I guess I just sort of spouted off.

I wonder what is going to happen?

Twist and Turns

2009-04-17T16:53:00.003-04:00

Life is an amazing thing, you know? Thinking back to my single-mom days, life wasn't amazing; it was hard. It sucked. Part of my problem is that I'm just not cut out to be a single mom - I'm just not that together. It's the old looking-good-on-the-outside-while-crumbling-on-the-inside single mom thing. Who asks for help? Not us.

But life is vastly different now. Observe my Monday: van overheated in Holland around 2 p.m. and Chris comes and rescues me. He then spends the rest of the night trying to fix it (that DAMN BOLT!), but not to worry: we have a spare car. Rewind to single mom days when there was no one to rescue me, no one to fix my car and you'd see a screaming meemie on the side of the road - with no cell phone. Ugly.

Then again, observe my Tuesday: Chris bought a new refrigerator for our new house, Emily fell off the monkey bars and had to go to the ER. Chris wouldn't think of letting us go alone so we all hung out together in the ER until Emily was ok'd and we went out to dinner.

Or take any other day of the week. It amazes me - truly amazes me - who this man is and how he's transformed my life. My love for him is equal parts awe, respect, adoration, inspiration and...his eyes, his muscles, his sense of humor. Did I say his muscles? Mmmmm....

Even still, when are we going to get that darn house done!?!??!

2009-04-17T16:40:00.001-04:00

Still a hoot!

2009-03-06T14:43:00.004-05:00

I know, perhaps it is unfair of me to make fun of the guys even after they have left office but gosh darn it all, I just can't resist!

P.S. Notice how all I do lately is post funny cartoons and stuff....well, sorry! It's just so much easier than actually putting two brains cells together and writing something! (Plus it's quicker...)

P.P.S. I'm also using a lot of ellipses lately too. And dashes. Where have all my punctuation super powers gone?

P.P.P.S. I just did a spell check, and you guessed it! Not a single misspelling. Hmm...apparently those super powers are still in effect....

My lament....

2009-02-27T15:06:00.002-05:00

Pass it this way, sister

2009-02-18T15:47:00.003-05:00

The Question of Motivation

2009-02-13T11:05:00.004-05:00

I received a great quote in my email this morning by Sir Alexander Paterson: “When a man is sufficiently motivated, discipline will take care of itself.” Wow, I thought, here is the answer to my lack-luster performance! I will finally be able to quit swearing, lose weight, keep my side of the bedroom clean, not let clutter accumulate on my dining room table, my dresser, my car and my purse. I will finally be able to motivate my children to do their homework, pursue hobbies instead of constantly FaceBooking, keep their room clean and be nice to each other. Perfect life, here I come!

That is when it dawned on me that for some people just the thought of doing the right thing is enough motivation. They reason that life is much easier, more fulfilling and less stressful if they simply do what they know they are supposed to do. But for others, like myself and my children, it seems like a headache to do all that stuff. So, we decide to procrastinate because it seems easier in spite of the often negative consequences. We reason that by putting off today what can easily be done tomorrow (or the next day or the next day or next week or next month…) we’ll be happier in the long run. Even we are not convinced by this logic and yet…our behavior speaks for itself.

Meanwhile, I am procrastinating on my work to contemplate how best to motivate slackers like myself and my children. Money is the obvious answer and yet who can afford the pay-out required to get us on track? We could target some specific behaviors, however, judging from times past, money will get tight and then the “allowance” goes out the window.

We’ve also grounded them from the computer, TV, cell phones and Wii. That has actually been pretty effective in the past but as motivation is an on-going struggle, grounding constantly seems unrealistic. Besides, I’d also have to be setting a good example, and so far I’m just as guilty as they are.

In thinking about this it occurs to me that while our environment exerts pressures to help guide our behavior, the question of motivation that outlasts the hurdles encountered when changing significantly is really one that boils down to our own internal thoughts, will and emotions. George Bernard Shaw said, “Imagination is the beginning of creation: you imagine what you desire, you will what you imagine, and at last you create what you will.” The control clearly lies within us.

Which brings me back to the dilemma of how to desire doing the right thing when most of the time I don’t. Perhaps I should just follow the advice of Mssrs. Marcus Buckingham and Curtis Coffman in their management book, “Now, Break All the Rules.” They argue that people don’t really change all that much and when we do, the way our brains work constantly nudges us back to the way we were before. The true path they say is to focus on improving your strengths and build your success from there and just forget about all those rotten old faults.

Which leads me to the conclusion that when you go searching for the hard answers in life you end up getting a lot of difficult-to-digest answers.

What kind of soup did you say that was?

2009-02-12T14:23:00.009-05:00

So the hubby met me for lunch today in what is reported to be the best Chinese (Laosian) restaurant in town. We walked in and there sat three of my co-workers (also known as bung holes if you read my FB). We walked over and said hi and we were told to try the Coconut Curry Soup – it’s the best. I got really excited because I love curry and so got myself a very large bowl of the soup.

Boy, were they right. That soup had the delicious depth of flavor that only curry can add to food and the hot kick from ground red pepper. Even the coconut milk added a layer of flavor that made my taste buds sing. There were also veggies and chicken – oh, those potatoes! They absorbed the flavors of the curry and salt and crumbled deliciously on my tongue. I don’t know that I’ve ever had a better bowl of soup, and firmly vowed right then and there to figure out how to make that soup at home. Yum!

In spite of being rather full I knew I couldn’t leave the restaurant without another bowl of that soup. I eagerly went over to the large sunken pot of the soup and began to delightedly fill my bowl anticipating all the foody loveliness in store once I got back to my table. About the 3rd ladleful I saw something unrecognizable flash into my bowl. Surely – that could not be a shirt tag?!?!?! Oh, indeed, it was! An XXL no less!!!!

Staggering with a combination of shock, amusement and disappointment, I hurried back to the table, put my bowl down and said, “Honey, look!” He took a look and said, “Is that a shirt tag? Or is an underwear tag? I think that’s an underwear tag!” Now please understand, as wildly unlikely as it is to get a shirt tag in your soup, I just can’t buy getting an underwear tag in your soup. I’m sticking with the shirt tag.

Now my hubby tends to be quite the assertive complainer. However, the tragi-comic element of the situation had him in a uncharicteristically congenial attitude about it. He calls the waitress over and shows her the soup. She says, “What is that, a tag!? Oh, so sorry!” and she takes it away. I watch her walk over and dump my soup out, and as I’m praying she takes the soup off the buffet, it is with relief I see her walk over and lift the lid to the soup pot. She stirs it a few times, replaces the lid and walks away. Walks away!?!?!??!?!?!? I could hardly believe my eyes. Before another moment passes, a man walks up and fills a bowl and then another man walks up. All in all, after the discovery, I saw six people walk up there and get soup – including the bung hole co-workers who each had two bowls apiece.

Even still, I gotta say, that was damn good soup.

True story

2009-02-11T17:42:00.007-05:00

Shuffling through an ex-coworkers desk, I came across the cartoon here. As you can see it is in some disrepair and had been casually tossed aside where it had once been tacked to her cubicle wall - in a place of honor, no doubt.

But here's the interesting thing: She was pregnant from the Shipping Guy out in the warehouse. One day, she just quit coming to work and the Shipping Guy called saying his doctor wouldn't let him come to work until further notice. A couple weeks later, the pregnant girl's boss is coming back from lunch and he sees her strutting down the street, still preggers. He goes back to the office and fires her (and the cause of the delay was.....?)

So fast forward a couple weeks and the warehouse gets an inventory count. Hmmmm, a number of our stainless steel and aluminum parts are missing. Like hundreds, perhaps thousands (unfortuantely, I didn't get to get in on the really juicy details). Suddenly things start to click for the upper "execs" at my company.

Apparently Amanda and Jay, the culprits described above, had been coming in on the weekends to finish up work they had gotten so far behind on. Jay would often have to use the company truck on these weekend overtime adventures (and yes, they were both paid overtime). So, Jay and Amanda weren't really working; they had thought up a get-rich-quick scheme to help keep them afloat since Jay apparently had some sort of severe addiction: they would just go scrap (perfectly good) parts at the scrap yard and pocket the money. This had been occuring for a number of months before they both disappeared. Suddenly that little cartoon there doesn't seem so innocent, huh?

Ok, so fast forward a couple more weeks after the cops investigate and come to find out, the Warehouse Manager had been also involved in the scrapping scheme. He also came up missing one day with an email that read "I am going to be out of the office for about a month." The next day his boss sent an email saying he wouldn't be coming back. Word is they are all getting prosecuted. And you know what else? The Warehouse Manager's son has taken over the managing position his father vacated.

And all because that damn beer was addicted to Jay! Poor guy.

This is purported to be true...and I believe it

2009-02-09T14:45:00.001-05:00

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.

Socialism, anyone?

2009-02-04T13:14:00.000-05:00

Remember when...

2009-01-30T13:17:00.003-05:00

From: Tmtg45a@aol.com
Date: Wed, 7 Apr 2004 12:27:21 -0400
Subject: from Grace
To: jamielynn525@hotmail.com

Dear Ant Jamie I love being in Tulsa. Grandma Larson sits on
her chare at night and she watchs Tv. I get to sleep in the Livingroom and watch Tv. I love doing chors for Grandma.
I also like playing Jenin.We went to a Restorant. There was
a man who makes Buloons. He made mom a spongebob.
We got to play at Jenins house. We played dogs and painted
wood.Myne was a hart with two colors on the sides and on top
and on top of that it said, Iln,.Gess what it standed for.
I love Noe. He is a boy at My School.My freinds cosoune.
The best part is I got to go to a Restorant with my dads
Relativs. Thay gave us a presant. It,s raining out side so my
wood got ruended and I can,t play outside.Well I gess it,s
goodbuy can,t keep you forever say hi to grandma for me.
goodbuy.

Goodbye Rabbit

2009-01-28T13:12:00.010-05:00

Pulitzer Prize winning author John Updike died Tuesday and chances are you've heard the sound bites already. He is the guy who wrote the “Rabbit” books. You know, “Run, Rabbit” and “Rabbit is Rich.” He is considered by many to be one of the great literary figures in American history. Here's the thing, though, the sound bites won't tell you: John Updike is a man who speaks truth. He's incredibly funny and not in that stand-up comedian kind of way. He's got this wry, ironic spin to everything he says but he never sounds supercilious or pretentious – it’s the sincerity in his humor that brings it home. His observations amuse and sting at the same time - you can't help but see yourself in his masterfully crafted observations; you laugh and think, ‘This man really gets it.’

He’s a guy who thinks deeply about things but doesn't talk over your head.

And he was human, infallibly human. John Updike, who like most of us had professional jealousies, envied Jack Kerouac so much he refused to read “On the Road” for years after it was published. Instead, Updike wrote a sort of antithesis of it with his novel “Run, Rabbit.” Updike thought that not everyone can be on the road all the time. Someone has got to be back at home doing things or nothing would get done, he said. That's what came out of his small-town Pennsylvania upbringing - an appreciation for home and not for running.

This theme is reflected in the character known as Rabbit. Rabbit was a family man, a very unhappy family man. And Rabbit ran; he hit the road like so many people in the 1960’s feeling constrained by middle class conformity adopted in the 1950’s, but inexorably Rabbit found himself going back home again. When asked about this, John Updike said, "I think a lot of us yearn for more freedom, the ultimate freedom of walking away, but then when we do it, we realize we don't know what to do now that we're free." Besides, he said bringing the theme back to Kerouac’s beatnik pretension, even though Kerouac hung around with Allen Ginsberg and that crowd, he used to run home to Mama Kerouac's cooking for months at a time, "So, so much for him." See, even Kerouac didn't want to be on the road all the time.

So, at a time when the middle class was bursting out onto the road and rebelling against the constraints of domestication, John Updike chose to write about just that; families and their real lives lived behind closed doors, the place where the rubber hits the road for all of us; the hard place, the place where there is no place left to hide, where we are who we really are, and we aren't running anymore.

Even if you never read a word he said, do yourself a favor - log onto http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=99945565 and download the NPR broadcast of interview excerpts with John Updike compiled by Terry Gross on Fresh Air from WHYY. His words will inspire you and move something deep within you that needs moving, I guarantee it.

Vinnie from Chicago, Blago's role model

2009-01-21T09:30:00.004-05:00

A day we will never forget...

2009-01-20T11:09:00.002-05:00

Ok, so this morning Chris smashed my car. Here’s what happened: he went out to start my car because it has a weak battery and often doesn’t start when it is sub-zero wind chill outside with ambient temps in the single digits. Ok, so he got it jumped but the hood latch wouldn’t latch. He dinked around with it for about 15 minutes, and meanwhile I am quickly becoming late for work. He’s all pissed off and tells me to take the van which was running. I hop in and the windshield is completely frosted and so try to get down the road as best I can since I can barely see.

I get to US 31 when I realize the temperature gauge is buried in the H. Holy shit, the van is totally overheated! I can’t pull off right away but I do so as soon as I can and turn off the engine which immediately starts to gong like Old Ben. Oh shit, right? So I call Chris and tell him what’s going on, and he says he’ll be right there to pick me up.

I wait and wait and wait and finally call him on his cell. He yells he just smashed the car. The hood flew up and he lost control on the icy roads and hit a snowbank. Thankfully he wasn’t hurt but the car spun about 8 times he said before crashing into the snowbank. Thank God he didn’t hit anything else! So I tell him to call the cops and they can pick me up on the way to the accident. So I wait and wait and wait and meanwhile my fingers and toes begin to really hurt from the cold. So I call him back and guess what? He’s driving the car and on his way to pick me up. When he gets there, the hood is sitting crooked on the car, sticking out about a foot and tied down with all kinds of ropes.

He starts the van but the engine is knocking horribly so it is probably toast.

My car, although drivable in the emergency circumstances, will need a new hood (goodbye grille) but it is unknown whether that will even attach since the hood blew a hinge on the drivers side and blew back in a twisted fashion so will most likely have warping on both sides where the hood attaches to the car. What a morning. Good thing we have his dad’s truck. I’m alternating between feeling that there is nothing broken that can’t be fixed and frustration, but all in all, I guess it’s ok. I’m trying to focus on what an amazing day this is and how exciting to be a part of the USA on such an historic event. I think I may check out the coverage - it might cheer me up a little.

Making Progress

2009-01-15T08:38:00.004-05:00

For any of you who may be interested, I have exactly six 6' sections of quarter round to poly (3 coats) and one large door that needs 1 coat poly one side and two coats poly on the other side. I have two drawers that need 3 coats poly each. AND THEN I AM DONE WITH REFINISHING MY KITCHEN CABINETS!!!! It only took me, what? Six months? Please keep in mind I had a total of 33 doors and 14 drawers to sand to bare wood, stain twice and poly 3 times PLUS ditto on the bases and the new bar we built. Quite an ordeal, I tell ya. If it hadn't been for the fact it was a custom kitchen with solid maple....it would have been a hatchet job, literally. If anyone ever considers it, my suggestion would be this: either paint the dang things or replace them altogether. Sanding, staining, sanding, staining, sanding, polying, sanding, polying, sanding, polying and sanding again is way too much work even when the result is beautiful. Trust me.

Stay tuned.....I will be posting pics of my progress and the (somewhat) finished result soon....that is, whenever I can find the time to download my pics. Sigh.

So much to say

2009-01-08T09:29:00.003-05:00

I wish world events would slow down until I can get my house finished, and I actually have time to write again. Each day I mentally compose multiple blog posts when I hear the latest news from around the world; inevitably I end my day in frustration because I haven't had the time to actually sit down and write my post. However, FBing isn't helping in that regard, so I've decided to join the ranks of my bro and resolve to be resolute.

Crumbs and All

2009-01-06T13:56:00.000-05:00

Did you know that if your keyboard ever stops working or starts acting really weird like it won't type for you, all you have to do is turn it over and dump all the crumbs and crap out of it? Really, it works like a charm. Ask me how I know.

Didn't have time to write so.....enjoy!

2009-01-05T13:05:00.000-05:00

My beautiful family and the wedding

2009-01-01T09:44:00.000-05:00

Please note, I wrote this post April 18th, 2008 but it was so meaningful I couldn't help but publish it in its current form. Hope you enjoy....

Every time I try to write about the wedding - indeed every time I think about it - I just become overwhelmed with emotion. I like what mom said on her blog - sometimes there really are perfect moments in life that so capture our hearts and minds that they become recorded like a video inside our very soul. That is how I feel, and in all honesty, our entire wedding, our entire day was absolutely the most beautiful and meaningful experience of my life. I am going to post Chris's vows to me and mine to him because they epitomize the evening in a lot of ways. I want to make a big shadow box with our place cards and some flowers and our program and our vows so that we have that reminder of our amazing day always in our sight.

From the very beginning of all the festivities, which began with Jamie and I getting our hair done, the day was filled with joy and peace and good things. It felt like coming home again having Jamie there with me getting my hair done. We were so combative throughout our years when we lived at home, and that carried into our adult years where we got along but just barely. Honestly, I don't really know why. Well, actually I do. It is because I was so judgemental of Jamie. I feel so sad when I think of it because I missed out on such a loving, giving, fun and amazing person and for what? So I could make myself feel a little superior and appease my jealousy. I am so glad I put that behind me. I can say that over the last couple years, God has really changed my heart and now I appreciate the differences Jamie and I have instead of being such a bitch.

When I asked her to be my Maid of Honor, I was hoping that the experience would help bring us closer together, and boy she just amazed me. I can honestly say that without her help, my wedding would not have had the of elegance, class and sophistication that it did. Plus, without her prodding in the early months of planning, who knows what we would have been doing - most likely a quickie service at the Justice of the Peace. She inspired me and helped me get over my "who the hell cares" hang up. Thank you, sister. You were the absolute best Maid of Honor in the whole wide world.

Oh, I can't forget her shining moment of heroism! This is what happened right before I had to appear for the private dinner with the wedding party and our parents. Jamie and I had gotten to the hotel around 3:30 after having our hair done, and the private dinner was due to start at 4:30. We had to be done with dinner by 6:00 so Jamie and I could change into our ceremony gowns and hopefully get some pictures. When we got to the hotel at 3:30, we started helping the girls with their hair. With four girls clamoring for our attention, it was a little overwhelming. Ok, so we are busily but happily working away on the girls' hair when Jamie says, "You should keep an eye on the time." The clock said 4:15! I didn't have my make up done, my gown on, my jewelry on and I had forgotten my vows down in my Bridal clutch purse that was in the Grand Ball Room for some reason. Mental scream!!!! I began running up and down the hallway from our hospitality suite to our private room because I was forgetting things and then once in my room I was shaking and sweating and started to cry because my hair was going to lose it's curl. Ok, I was in a full blown panic attack with large sobs thrown in for good measure. Oh, and some major self-pity. Chris kept saying, "Calm down, honey. It will be ok." He wanted to have Jamie come in and help me get ready, but I kept saying, "What can she do to help? I can get ready by myself." But meanwhile I'm in an absolute puddle of anguish. Finally, after about a half hour of this, Chris says, "That's enough. I'm getting your sister." Jamie came into the room (looking beautiful, by the way) and immediately saw I was in a terrible state. She very gently kneeled down in front of me and put her hands on my knees, and I saw so much love and compassion and caring, it went immediately to my heart. She said, "Laura, it's going to be ok. Everyone is down stairs mingling and enjoying themselves, so you don't have to worry. You don't have to rush. Everything is fine." Those words calmed my nerves and I don't know, it's like something in my soul lifted and my heart opened up and suddenly I felt light and excited and at peace. I will never forget that as long as I live.

Well, once Jamie got me all tussied up, we went down to the Garden Room at Jacks (which looked beautiful and elegant) and began our dinner. Chris and I had bought presents for the bridal party and our parents, so it was a lot of fun to pass those out and say how much we appreciated each of them. I had two glasses of wine, so by the time Jamie and I got back to the room to change into our gowns, I was floating and giggling and just really having fun. Grace and Hailie came into the room, and we all did Satin Hands which was a lot of fun. We kind of goofed around and giggled a lot (and I used Chris's toothbrush to clean under my nails which raised a volley of giggles and an solemn vow to never tell a single soul). Ok, I admit, I was giddy. We were having so much fun, we weren't paying any attention to the time when Melissa, the Banquet Manager, came to tell me that it was 7:15. We had put on the invitations the wedding started at 7, but we really planned on 7:10 because that would give the last-minuters a chance to find a table and get seated. I was late! But I didn't care. I was so excited and my heart was just beating a million miles an hour. I started to get a little nervous. After all, I was about to give my life to the only man who has ever truly known me, truly loved me and truly devoted himself to me. I felt like Cinderella, I kid you not.

So, Aunt Valerie and Marty from her band played "Thank You" by Led Zeppelin which is what we walked to (Chris and I walked together). I am going to post the lyrics here because the more I reflect on the words and the more I remember the way Aunt Valerie's voice sounded, the more incredible it becomes for me:

If the sun refused to shine, I would still be loving you.

When mountains crumble to the sea, there will still be you and me.

Kind woman, I give you my heart,

Kind woman, nothing more.

Little drops of rain whisper of the pain, tears of loves lost in the days gone by.

My love is strong, with you there is no wrong,together we shall go until we die.

My, my, my.

An inspiration is what you are to me, inspiration, look... see.

And so today, my world it smiles, your hand in mine, we walk the miles,

Thanks to you it will be done, for you to me are the only one.

Happiness, no more be sad, happiness....I'm glad.

If the sun refused to shine, I would still be loving you.

When mountains crumble to the sea, there will still be you and me.

I just cry when I read those words. I can hear Aunt Valerie's voice, so beautiful singing that right to Chris and I. Like I said in my other post, I never believed my life and my love could reflect such deep passion and devotion and togetherness - and to have it returned.....it brings me to my knees in gratitude. Ooo! I forgot to mention! Chris got me an ipod nano for my wedding present, which hellow! How great is that!?!?! But anyway, I have to play Thank You at least once every day because it means so much to me. I am playing it right now. :)

After the Reverend did the introduction, Chris and I lit a candle in remembrance of those who could not be there. We did that because he just lost his sister, plus there's Kady and my grandma. And there were guests there who had just lost a son and brother. It was something we all felt really strongly we wanted to do. We put the candle in the lantern so it could burn brightly during the whole wedding and reception.

Oh, perhaps I should say a word about how we did the wedding and reception. It was in the Grand Ball Room with all the round tables decorated with a 12x12 mirror, an Eiffel tower vase with one white gladiola and four candles, one on each corner of the mirror. Everyone said it was gorgeous, and with the lights down it added an element of intimacy and coziness that I just loved. Everyone at the tables sat in a crescent so no one had to turn around in their chair and I did placecards for families that needed a full table (so they wouldn't have to split up). It was a dessert reception with the wedding cake and three kinds of these delicious mousse desserts in fluted champagne glasses. We had an open bar, so later in the night, like around 10 pm, we served Artichoke dip and some kind of fancy cheese and meat tray so no one got too drunk or felt sick from dancing and drinking. Anyway, enough of the stats, back to the fun.

Ok, so Chris and I each wrote a devotion statement I guess you could say that we read to each other before we said our traditional vows. Ray has a great little video clip of that on his blog. I tried to make mine a little bit funny because I knew that the whole wedding was going to be a tear-jerker. Anyway, that was cool. Then, when we were pronounced man and wife, the girls (Grace, Emily, Hailie and Brandie) sang "Hero" by Enrique Iglacias. Now that was awesome. Chris got really really choked up listening to the video on Ray's blog. He had to step aside for a moment. But how much better does it get than dancing with your new husband while your children (and neice) sing "I can be your hero, baby. I can kiss away your pain. I will stand by you forever. You can take my breath away." Oh, the night was full of so many moments I will never forget and that are like treasures in my heart.

After that, we cut the cake and greeted all the guests and after everyone had their dessert, I threw the bouquet and Emily caught it. I spent some time on the dance floor, but most of my night was spent visiting with the guests. I took a lot of pictures toward the end of the reception (when I realized that if I didn't get on the stick, I wouldn't have any pictures of my reception which actually wasn't true. Uncle Yoobee and Ray and Mom all have great pictures on their blogs).

Anyway, there are so many more cool moments to share....the dance off between the kids, Emily break dancing, everyone doing the Cupid Shuffle and the Casper Slide, how happy my grandpa looked and how everyone joyfully welcomed Mai to the family, Chris's best friends' wives who have been so on the outs they wouldn't be in the same room together for 20 years were laughing and giggling and hugging with grins for pictures. It was truly amazing all the wonderful experiences and healing and enjoyment that came out of our wedding. I told Chris, it absolutely changed my life. And it has.

Lovely lovely holiday

2008-12-29T10:09:00.002-05:00

This was probably the best Christmas/bday season I've ever had. It was just lovely from start to finish in spite of being terribly, horribly busy and the sadness of Chris' dad and Melissa's mom just passing. All-in-all, we gave the kids great stuff they really love and Chris totally absolutely outdid himself with my prezzies. :) Plus, the bday prezzies were on the hot tip, so everything is hunky dory in my life.

However, the other day I askidentally did the FB thing which is something I deeply resisted but felt curious about and finally acquiesced to, all of which has left me scratching my head over the shameless self-promotion of brother dear. 72 friends, hellow!?!? You are just friending everyone apparently. For shame. Ray, I hate to say it, but....you've become an FB ho. You need to find out what is happening with your book, after all moving to 2nd shift was about "writing" not "FB-ing." And no I am not jealous that I don't have mad hours to play and make friends on FB. I am just too busy in my quaint little life anyway. So nyah. ;)

What I won't read

2008-12-22T13:57:00.005-05:00

Some co-workers and I took one of our Chinese suppliers out to lunch a couple weeks ago. I work with a Project Engineer who is drier than sawdust, and of course he accompanied us which frankly worried me from a conversation standpoint. His idea of a good story is how his sandal squeaked, and he thought it was a kitten. Yeah, that is one of his rather more involved stories and takes him at least five minutes every time he tells it.

So we are at lunch, and he begins telling this involved story about a comic book he read where Superman crash landed in Russia during Stalin's reign and became a proponent of Soviet Communism and the Marxist Party et al. He's sitting there telling us this - and why I haven't a clue except maybe the presence of a Chinese national who lives in a Communist country spurred his recollections - when finally I couldn't take it anymore. You know my political views; I burst out and said, "Well, I simply couldn't read a book like that-" and my co-worker said, "Why, because it has pictures?"

Har-HAR! I laughed really hard at that one. Sometimes even simple people can stumble into a really, really good joke. But now you know everyone, don't get me any books with pictures. ;)

We're all weirdos

2008-12-16T10:09:00.003-05:00

Somehow last night we got onto the subject of weird, random things we do in our own mind that actually drive us nuts and make us feel like we're bizzare, crazy or just plain obssessed.

It started with Grace talking about writing, and it reminded me of when I was a little kid I used to write - as a story - everything that other people said and did. For instance, if we were sitting having a conversation, in my mind I'd be writing '"I just don't know," John said and turned to look out the window.' I did this constantly, almost obssessively, and I felt so strange for doing it that I eventually confessed with tears to my Uncle Brian that I thought I was crazy.

We all laughed, and Chris said he used to work for a company where he would have to count plants with a clicker. So, for hours during a certain part of the year he'd walk up and down rows clicking, clicking, clicking. Well, soon he began counting the clicks. Next thing he knew, he was counting everything - the number of signs on the side of the road, the number of times someone blinked, the number of times someone said "um...." until finally he thought he would go crazy. Luckily he was saved by a career switch and the counting stopped.

So Grace pipes up and says when she is in a car, every time she goes by a sign she clicks her teeth and every time she clicks her teeth it means the sign disappears, no longer obscuring her view of nature. Like, wow.

And all this talk just got me thinking, what kind of weird, random things do you do in your mind?

Trivia or not?

2008-12-04T09:41:00.008-05:00

There's this book that says you are truly your best when you focus on your strengths (and not focus on trying to eradicate your weaknesses), and it offers a super-extensive on-line questionnaire to help determine which of the 35-plus personality traits are your strengths and goes into something like 250 sub-categories of the strengths. So, you take this quiz, and at the end it spits out your strengths, and you are supposed to be thrilled. I wasn't.

One of the things it said I excel at is collecting things. What!?!?! Me, collect things? I think collectibles are the biggest waste of money, and collectibles usually look really stupid, so where the heck do you put all the crap while it is supposedly accumulating value? I would never collect things! Ever!

But then when I started reading about this particular trait it said that some people don't collect things, they collect knowledge or books or quotes. Hm, I said. Perhaps this is me after all. Check, check, check, I do all three.

So, I've had to get real with myself. I never considered myself a trivia buff. Trivia bores me, I would always say. And yet I find myself constantly throwing out "interesting tidbits of information" to my family and friends. This information never entered the realm of trivia in my opinion, as I preferred to consider it practical knowledge. Or perhaps general knowledge....or even miscellaneous knowledge. And the more I thought about that, the more I realized that the only thing that distinguishes trivia from the rest of the knowledge pool is whether you personally consider it worthwhile or not. Because I consider it interesting and worthwhile to know does not entail that you find it so, and if in fact you do not, you could accurately call it trivia; it is in fact trivia to you.

And that's when it hit me. I really am a nerd. As a matter of fact, I just hit the spell check and it said, "no misspellings found." And that's my strength?!!?

I can ace any trivia quiz you bring on

I'm fluent in JavaScript as well as Klingon

Huh??? Explain this, please!

2008-11-20T15:51:00.004-05:00

For a few days there it was looking like Congress was going to begrudgingly put up the money to keep the Big 3 afloat for a while and hopefully begin the turn-around to making the companies profitable again. But no. It doesn’t appear that there is willingness anymore, and what appears to be the big fat straw that broke the camel’s back is their individual luxury jet jaunts into DC for the hearings. That was just too much, Congress is saying. And the media. And stupid other people who are smart but who cares because I think that luxury jets are not the point.

Essentially what the Congress is saying is this: Big 3, we don’t need your tax revenue or GDP, we don’t need the subsequent small businesses that count on you for their livelihood, we don’t think the 3 million people working for you deserve their jobs, they just make too much money and have way-too-good benefits, so we think they are better off getting unemployment and finding another job, and we don’t need the technology that you might have created enabling green energy or alternative fuel vehicles or any other thing you might have contributed. And in fact, this is a great time to let you fail – right now when we are in our biggest financial crisis maybe ever.

Make no mistake, as ugly as financial bailout is, the fallout of the Big 3 failing will be far, far worse.

Listen, Congress, the Big 3 are asking for 3% of what you’ve wasted so far on companies that have no accountability and have nothing to show for it. Can’t you spare a little change for the sake of our nation, our future and to protect this country from the devastation of total auto industry meltdown? Just a little change!?!?

Today's funnies

2008-11-19T09:43:00.004-05:00

Here are some....oh, let's just say "interesting" international interpretations of our language (as posted by Marcheline's Mental Meatloaf):

"On the menu of a Swiss restaurant: Our wines leave you nothing to hope for." And what should we pair our wine with, a big fat helping of despair?

"In a Paris hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk." Just a Paris thing?

"Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand: Would you like to ride on your own ass?" The answer is, I do it everyday, right Chris? Oh, kill me! Not a good wife, no.

"In a Rome laundromat: Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time."

"In a Japanese hotel: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid."

"In a Hong Kong supermarket: For your convenience, we recommend courteous, efficient self-service." As opposed to really shitty self-service.

"On the menu of a Polish hotel: Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion." Can I get that beaten up in the city people's fashion, please?

"In an Acapulco hotel: The manager has personally passed all the water served here." Refreshing!

"From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner: Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself."

"From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo: When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor." Actually, this methodology explains how Chris and I fell in love; first he trumpeted me melodiously, and then followed up by tootling me with vigor.

Smart is as smart does.

2008-11-17T16:49:00.009-05:00

I just spent four days – FOUR DAYS – trying to debug some Visual Basic code for an Access database I created. I was executing a FROM statement using table names that contained commands in them. Access no likey; apparently Access likes it when you use non-command names for your tables so it doesn’t get confused. It’s kinda like when you name your kid “Kick.” You want to tell your kid to pick up the ball, but when you say, "Kick, the ball-" the kid kicks the ball and never listens long enough for you to tell him to pick up the ball. Now, you have to go chase the ball. You’d think this would be rather intuitive for a genius like me, but nooo……it took me four days to figure it out.

It just goes to prove my “smart is as smart does” theory. About 5 years ago I took an IQ test out of curiosity. I scored so freaking high I thought for sure it must have been a mistake. I found another IQ test, took it and scored higher. I concluded that the IQ test had been dumbed down for the typical American and average smart people like me were scoring as if we were Einstein’s offspring, and maybe 50 years ago we’d just be smarter-than-average-Joe’s offspring. Perhaps I was right.

So, does being smart actually help you in life? Well, I had a pretty easy time of it in school. I didn’t have to work really hard, although I did study. I seem to pick up on things pretty quickly, but I get bored easily, so long before I’ve mastered something I move on to the next thing. I guess you could say I’m a generalist.

But when I take this whole “smart” label and apply it to my life, I see little evidence of being truly intelligent. Perhaps the reason has to do with that whole EQ versus IQ issue. The EQ theory says that the true intelligence that matters is the one that governs how you problem solve and make decisions and relate to other people and evaluate your experiences and observations. If I were a high scorer on that scale, I would have probably figured out my syntax error days ago. Maybe even on the first day!

Which leaves me thinking – as I’ve often done – that being smart is not such a gift afterall. As a matter of fact, if you think about it, we all know several of those super-smart-but-never-quite-succeeded people. And I do happen to know a lot of individuals that have gone very far in spite of not having been a top scholar.

So maybe it isn’t such a bad thing when your kid comes home with Bs and Cs instead of straight As – provided your kid does a reasonable job of interpreting and evaluating the life they lead and seems to make good decisions, because as far as my life experience has shown me, it is these people that succeed more often then stupid old geniuses like myself. So, wish for common sense, folks and leave the calculatin’ to the mad geniuses – you’ll be much happier for it.

Scene from Friday's GM Executive Meeting

2008-11-07T14:09:00.001-05:00

What it is all about.....

2008-11-06T11:36:00.004-05:00

I ran across a beautiful statement by Michelle Obama in an interview about the transition her family will make from Chicago and the relative obscurity of their lives there to the national stage in Washington DC. Here she is responding to the question of what will be most important in the transition for her family:

"...But just continuing to make sure that our first priority is getting them
into schools that make sense for them, making sure that they have activities
that they care about, that we're there for them to help them with their
homework, that we go to their parent-teacher conferences, that we go to all
their events. It's important to continue to do that, no matter what their
father's job is. And he has to continue to make them a priority even as he's the
leader of the free world. I think that's an important thing for him to model for
others. It's this notion that if he can do it, then we all have to really fight
for it. Because what we're going to be fighting for, for our kids, is what we
have to fight for, for all of our kids. They have to be center in this society
and this nation. We have to put their education, their needs, their well-being
first and foremost. As adults, we can balance the other stuff. We're the
grown-ups [laughs]."

Now, please contrast her statement with the first comment posted below this interview:

Posted By: Clatech @ 11/06/2008 11:00:37 AM
Comment:
Richard Pryor had keen insight when he said "White people are so
stupid"
I'm so fed up with our corrupt political system after breaking my
back for years building my business and fighting from going bankrupt, a bunch of
naïve Americans elect an even more naïve career politician, president. I and
many of my business partners have decided to pack it in, I'm laying off 50 plus
workers starting next month and retiring. No way in hell am I going to pay this
numskull's capital gains tax and run my business into the ground before I can
cash out!

Perhaps the gentleman who is so concerned about cashing in his business has forgotten why he did it all in the first place...his family. We need a leader who stands up and says, "It isn't all about making as much money as we can before we die. It is about being there for our families, providing good opportunities for our children, and creating a society that they can live peacefully and prosper in." I am so proud that our next President believes in the value of family over the value of a dollar.

That is not to say that the economic future of this country isn't important; in fact, each family's prosperity and ability to provide opportunities for their children relies on a healthy economy. But I think the thing that offended me most about this man's post is that he was going to lay off 50 workers - who no doubt each have families - so that he can "cash out." No doubt he failed to listen to Obama's acceptance speech where Obama explained that the economic trouble our nation is in will be felt by all and would need cooperation and sacrifices by all so that the nation can recover. Essentially what this man said is, "Hey, I've worked hard all these years so I deserve to retire on a big fat money couch." Ok, so far this is pretty consistent with American values, but then he goes on (ok, I go on paraphrasing his private thoughts): "Now this idiot politician wants me to pay more in taxes if I cash out like I want to, so in order to cash out with my big fat money couch, I will lay off 50 people and to hell with what they need, I want my big fat money couch!"

I liked what one poster replied to him, "Wow, dude, you need to take a Valium and turn off Fox News and then things will start to feel a lot better." I can't agree more.

And you know, that is why I am so darn happy Obama won; we have come to a place of economic and military disaster because of an administration that believes in the kind of values expressed by "Clatech" the idiot poster. I shudder in fear of what another four or eight years of that kind of thinking would have done to our country and to our families.

Remember, folks, it is really all about our children. If we keep that in focus, kind of like the What Would Jesus Do reflection, I think we can keep it all really straight. Forget that, and it all tanks. Simple.

article excerpt taken from www.newsweek.com, "Michelle, On the Move" by Richard Wolffe, 11/5/08

It's a new world today....

2008-11-05T16:11:00.006-05:00

"On January 20, an African-American will begin leading a country that first
brought Africans to its shores as slaves and refused their descendants full
rights until well into the 20th century; a country that was still wondering
until the election results finally came in if race would doom his
candidacy."

There are many things to be said about the new world President Elect Barack Obama will usher in as the 44th President of the United States. However, everything - absolutely everything - takes on a deep, abiding gravitas because of the truth of the statement above. It is the starting point of understanding what this election means to America, and it is the starting point of understanding how deeply we crave change and unity and repudiation of the nightmare of 8 years of the Bush administration (not to mention the 6 years of a Republican Congress). We want to be seen in a new light; we want a new perspective on the challenges this nation faces; we want a new approach in everything. But at the core of all this angst and need and want on behalf of the United States lies an historical paradigm shift in the way we see our nation, and it is because we elected a black man from humble origins. And I don't know about all of you, but I felt the earth shift last night, and I don't ever think this world will be the same.

Quote by Jonathan Mann, http://www.cnn.com/, The New Face of the United States, 11/5/08

2008-11-04T09:00:00.004-05:00

"Believe that you can do it, under any circumstances. Because if you believe you can, then you really will. That belief just keeps you searching for the answers, then pretty soon you get it."
– Wally "Famous" Amos

"Can anything be sadder than work unfinished? Yes, work never begun."
– Christina Rossetti

A Hero Lost

2008-10-30T12:20:00.001-04:00

When I look at my husband I see his father. His father was a man who taught his boys everything he knew, raising them to be some of the best men you'll ever meet. His father had an injury as a child and contracted osteomyelitis (sp?) causing deafness and infections in his long bones lasting his entire life. He never let that stop him; despite being deaf and so ill from osteo that he had to endure about 30 surgeries over the years, he worked hard so his wife could stay home raising all 7 of their kids. Chris' dad could do anything. He owned a barbershop in GH for 35 years and after retirement made a hobby of chair caning he carried on for over 30 years making many friends along the way. He raised horses most of his life and was a champion rider. He could make or fix anything you can think of. He was hilarious and could always tell a good joke. He read lips and was very opposed to deaf people relying on sign language - it left them out of the main stream of life, he said. He read voraciously and has literally thousands of books, but his favorites were always the cowboy stories. He loved music and as a deaf man used to win the dance contests down at the dance hall. He could feel the beat, he said. He was a life-long Republican, effectively cancelling his wife's life-long Democratic vote. He was married to his wife Angela, a fiery little Italian woman, for 41 years and sang a love song to her every morning of their life together until Monday of this week when he died on his way to make her morning coffee.

Richard Baldus was a man that deeply affected the lives of all those he met, and he was the idol of many young boys who practically lived over at the Baldus house during their childhood. I watched big strong grown men weep in the last few days over the loss of a man who can only be described as a hero. And when I look at my husband, I see his father.

Chris arrived shortly after his dad went down. He spent the next 15 minutes desperately trying to save his dying father, begging his dad to breathe again, begging God to help him save his dad. He did CPR so long, he had soaked through his shirt and sweatshirt.

He called me after the paramedics arrived, sobbing, saying, "My dad is dead, and I tried to save him, but I couldn't."

We all know that a day is appointed for our birth and a day is appointed for our death. There was nothing Chris could do to save his father on that day. But this is the thing that matters most: there are moments in our life when we are faced with a gut-wrenching, horrific moment where our action will prove the kind of person we are. How we react in that moment will change our life; if we chicken out because we are scared and don't know what to do, we will spend our life regretting that moment, and who we are as a person will forever be diminished. But my husband, terrified as he was, got on his knees and did everything a man could possibly do to save his father, and in that moment proved the mettle within his soul.

I've only been a part of Chris' family for a few years now, but I feel his father's death as deeply as if it were my own father. This man meant so much to his family and gave every ounce of himself everyday to make everything ok for each of them, and that is the kind of man he raised, the man I get to call my husband. I love Richard Baldus for who he was, for what he represented and for the gift he gave to everyone he met and those he never met - his integrity, caring, never-give-up spirit carries on in each one of his children and for that I am so grateful. I am grateful to have been able to share in the few short years I had with him and am absolutely blessed to be with a man that learned everything he knows from his father.

2008-10-29T10:31:00.001-04:00

Ride on! Rough-shod if need be, but ride on! Ride on over all obstacles, and win the race!
-Charles Dickens

Shut your mouth when you are talking to me

2008-10-23T16:46:00.006-04:00

I truly am sick of all the snarky t-shirts out there, but snorgtees has some of the best I've seen, and I just can't keep them to myself any longer.

What more can I say? Sometimes it's ok to just let the pictures do the talking.

Obama reads by blog, but Bernanke does not

2008-10-21T11:46:00.003-04:00

Hooray for Obama telling the American people like it is (oh, if only we could get him to retract his "redistribute wealth" statement all would be well), but that Bernanke! We'll call him Big Boil Bernanke because he is a big boil on the butt of the American taxpayer.

I don't know how many of you caught this since it seems no one is reporting on it, but yesterday Bernanke came out in favor of a stimulus package and basically said the following:

1. don't worry about the national debt and go ahead and make it bigger because we need to make it bigger right now

2. Americans need more credit so they'll buy more stuff and get the economy moving again

Oh, and there was some other stuff, but seriously folks, after you hear those first two points, why aren't we shooting this guy? Let's see, we are in the worst financial crisis since blah blah blah and we got here by overspent Americans defaulting on their mortgages....we are now increasing our national debt by almost 2 trillion dollars to bail out the failing financial institutions that gave out these bad mortgages and were guilty of fiscal mis-management......I know! Let's grow our national debt even more with a stimulus package and encourage Americans to take on more debt and we can all buy our way out of financial crisis! Yeah, that's the ticket. Even my 10 year old daughter would know that won't work.

Ever notice how Bernanke sort of looks like Rasputin? He was bad for his country, too.

Rambling Ranting Raves

2008-10-16T10:38:00.003-04:00

Thank you, dear readers, for your patience with my excessively long posts as of late. As I'm sure you could tell, there was (is) a lot on my mind.

The good news is that Obama did stand up like a man and say (to some extent) that cutting expenditures will be a top priority in his administration, and he also intimated that Americans also need to be fiscally responsible. That is the closest I've heard so far to no-nonsense, common sense, responsible economics from the candidates.

However, I am concerned about all the entitlements that Barack is proposing; he makes a good point about cutting the fat to beef up the underfunded-but-essential-and-effective projects. My overriding concern, though, is that he will slow down the economy even more with his tax increases. On the other hand, I like what he says about tax breaks for small companies that create jobs here in the US. That's good. I don't know, all in all it is really tough for someone like myself to extrapolate from all the various talk and proposals what has a chance of making it to actual policy and actually work for the country.

One thing is for sure, McCain's health plan would be a disaster. Taxing health benefits!?@? I would see my "taxable income" increase by $12-15,000 a year without having a dime more income - oh, wait. I'd have less because of being taxed. Duh! There are other troubling aspects to his health plan, but that's the worst aspect by far.

As I said in my earlier post, the bottom line for all us regular folks is figuring out a way to keep our heads above water for the next couple years while all of this stuff plays out. As for me and my family (and I'm talking extended family here, too), we should talk amongst ourselves about what we may be facing and how we can help each other. Don't you agree?

I love you, my readers (fans). You are more patient than I deserve.

Thinking Time

2008-10-15T09:06:00.005-04:00

Typically we all have our trigger-point issues that ultimately determine who we vote for on the Presidential ballot every four years (assuming, of course, that you, dear reader, actually vote). These are usually top-of-mind issues for most voters, and the guy that delivers the best position on our trigger-point issue gets our vote. This year the trigger-point issue for the majority of voters is the economy - no surprise there. However, the scary thing about voting on the economy as our trigger-point this year...the fact that no one - not even the smart guys - know what the hell we are doing, how it will impact the economy or what to do to make the economy better. We are virtually on an economic learning curve with the potential to permanently change the way we live our lives.

Yes, I do mean permanent. This crisis entails permanent change in governmental behavior and spending, institutional change at the regulatory and financial levels and all that trickles down to change in our personal fiscal behavior.

Oh, she's not beating that dead horse again!

No, I'm not, but I am going to beat on the permanent change drum. As a nation, there needs to be fundamental and permanent change to ensure that we never return to this state of economic crisis again. We need to become a nation of producers-and-savers, not borrow-and-spenders. That is like the old Sunday school song, "so-and-so built his house upon a rock" and his house stood the weather-beating. The guy who built his house upon the sand? Well, it all got washed away! (Comment if you remember who the guys were in this song - I can't remember.)

We built our economy on the idea that if people keep borrowing money, everyone gets rich. People borrow and then spend, and Home Depot's stock goes up, and the investors get richer, and the banks make m0ney on the interest of that loan, and the banks have more money to lend, and people go out and borrow more money and spend more money and everyone gets what they want...what a beautiful fiscal cycle! Ooops, didn't work out so well when Joe Six Pack stopped making his loan payments. And then a couple of his neighbors did the same thing and on and on throughout neighborhoods in America. Bad Joe Six Pack! He ruined the whole thing! Everyone could have kept making money if it weren't for him and his over-spent, over-indebted buddies.

Wrong.

Let's take a deeper look at Joe Six Pack. First of all, his wages have been stagnant these past eight years while costs kept rising. In a lot of cases, Joe Six Packs have actually taken pay cuts...pay cuts after being laid off because his factory went overseas, and the unemployment was running out, and he needed a job at any cost, even to the extent of working for less. Hey, some money is better than no money.

Here's another thing about Joe Six Pack. When he was on unemployment, chances are he did get behind on his bills since he was probably maxxed out on expenses for his income level. When that income level dropped to unemployment compensation something had to go, and it wasn't his grocery bill. When he took that lower paying job, it is doubtful he was able to get caught up.

Then there's the matter of health insurance. His family most likely lost their coverage when he lost his job. Oh, there's Cobra coverage, but at $1000 premiums for a family, chances are they didn't opt for it. So, the family only had a couple doctor's appointments while Joe was out of work, but it only added to the debt load. Now the creditors are calling about that, too.

So, Joe goes back to work and even with his annual 2% raises, he's not getting ahead; in fact, he's getting poorer. Eventually the pressure from creditors pushes him to make payments that he can't afford, and he begins to get behind on his house payments. Default. Auction. Foreclosure. And his family becomes the scapegoat for a society that placed their bets on way-too-long odds.

For Joe Six Pack, losing his job sucked, but the subsequent financial meltdown enveloped his family in misery for years as they struggled to keep afloat, eventually hitting rock bottom with the foreclosure of their family home...and their family dream. And all the banks have to say about it is he never should have fallen behind in the first place. So, you're out, buddy.

In hindsight, Joe shouldn't have maxxed out his income for nicer cars, a nicer house and the nicer niceties of life. He should have saved more, spent less and lived within his means. On that, I am sure we all agree.

But fundamentally, what went wrong in Joe's life? His employment situation. Gosh, doesn't it just make you wonder if there was something fundamentally wrong with the economy when so many Joe Six Packs went through the same thing?!?!

Ok, you know my answer to that question. But here's the follow-up: Ready for this? Ok, here it goes...

If the fundamental problem was an economy that could not support jobs and wages consistent with a middle-class lifestyle, how do you restore an economy that supports jobs and wages when the bottom just fell out of the economy, and no one has any money from Joe Six Pack all the way up to the Federal Reserve and all the financial institutions in between?

And that is where my theory of permanent change comes in. Look, folks, I hate to be the harbinger of gloom-and-doom, but we have not seen the bottom to this crisis, and while world powers scramble to restore stability to a fundamentally off-kilter world economy, we are left with the challenge if living day to day and somehow meeting the challenge of rising costs and lower wages. Or no wages at all.

And to make matters worse, we can't look to Washington to help us out since they've maxxed their credit capacity on bailing out our greedy rotten banks and such. Which means, folks, we are on our own in spite of all the Presidential candidates are proposing. There just isn't the money.

So, since the President and the Presidential candidates don't have the courage to tell us to change our lifestyle - in the absence of true leadership - we will have to take it upon ourselves.

God, that sucks.

The Politics of Sacrifice, a diatribe in favor of prosperity

2008-10-10T14:49:00.002-04:00

I waited for it, in fact I hoped for it. It was a moment whose time had come. In the debate on Tuesday night, Tom Brokaw dared ask the question that Americans most fear the answer to: Due to the extreme economic crisis facing our nation, what will you ask Americans to sacrifice after you become President? Essentially, each candidate’s reply amounted to the same thing: nothing much if anything at all.

It was the moment when a true leader would stand up and deliver the truth: “My fellow Americans, as much as we’ve talked about the role of Wall Street’s greed in the current economic crisis, we’ve been remiss in not talking about the responsibility of every American to exercise fiscal responsibility. Now is the time in which, instead of asking for more entitlement programs, Americans need to reflect on the words of JFK, ‘Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country.’”

The reason no candidate stood up and said that? The fear of political suicide.

But you know what I think? I think that deep in the heart of every over-spent American, he or she wants to hear that from the leader of our nation. They don’t want to hear George W. Bush’s “go out and spend for your country” anymore. Look where that got us in the last seven years! The average American household saves an average of -3% each year. Oops, I’m sorry. Let me re-state that. The average American household consumes an excess of 3% over their annual income every year. That means Americans increase their personal debt load by 3% each year. And we have the audacity to wag our finger at Washington.

Oops, let me re-state that. Americans have been doing what capitalists do: following the old “whoever dies with the most stuff wins” mentality. We consume. We’re Americans. It’s what we do. We no longer make anything – no, let the slobs overseas slobs do it for pennies on the dollar so we can go to Kirkland’s in the mall and buy the latest trendy resin house-thingy to make it look like we travel the world and have really sophisticated taste. And we buy our kids i-pods for Christmas and upgrade our computer and buy a new car and buy a much more expensive house than we know we can afford (‘Oh, but the interest rates are so low right now!!!!”), and we go to Hollister for school-clothes shopping so our kids can fit it and it goes on and on and on.

You see, somehow Americans have bought into the myth that consuming builds our economy and that it is our patriotic duty to do so. Um, talk to any economist or family credit counselor, and they’ll tell you that the responsible, patriotic and fiscally-healthy thing to do is to live within your means, and save or invest your money if you can afford to do so. Actually, that last bit might become absolutely crucial because it looks like our Social Security is going down man, dooooown.

Now, I realize it isn’t very fair of me to pick on my fellow Americans for living the way they have; my point wasn’t to criticize their lifestyle so much as to point out that Americans have been doing what they were expected to do and that expectation came from Washington. They snookered us into believing that we can have a healthy economy of non-producing consumers and that the bottom would never drop out. Ultimately, that is just NOT TRUE.

So, in that crucial moment in the debate where Americans needed to hear the ol’ tighten-the-belt speech, they got placation. They were essentially told not to worry about the economy and not to adjust their lifestyle. No, in fact it was implied that by remodeling your house to make it more green and efficient, and by buying a fuel efficient car, it would help the economy. Spend money and the economy can bounce right back.

Grrr!!!!

Where is the leadership, I would like to know? Where is the common sense that says we can’t buy our way out of this crisis? Where are the persons of substance willing to stand up and say:

“My fellow Americans, get out of debt. Save some money. Invest some money. Live
within your means. It’s not enjoyable, but in order to get out of the crisis, we
are going to have pitch in and do our part to restore economic stability and
personal responsibility. I will not ask you to do something this federal
government is not willing to do, so you will see us tighten our belts. (And here
is where I DO agree with McCain) We need to put a spending freeze on all but the
essential programs such as defense and social security. Everything else must be
examined against its own merit, and the standard that it must be judged upon is:
1. Is it essential enough to
warrant the expenditure?
2. Can we
afford it?
3. Is this something
that Americans can provide for themselves through greater personal and fiscal
responsibility? Or…
4. Is this a
burden that is too much for one family or one person to bear and therefore needs
to be provided by a much larger entity, and if so, is the Federal government the
proper entity to provide the measure of this need?

“It’s not that
hard. American families indeed are doing it everyday in spite of the excesses of
some. It is something the Federal government needs to be committed to, and it is
something the people of America need to be committed to. And that, voters, is
the way to help America.”

Now that, my fellow Americans, is someone worthy of the Presidency.

I would just like to say....

2008-10-09T12:57:00.001-04:00

Thank you to whoever peed on the toilet seat. I now have your pee on my leg.

If crouch you must, the least you could do is wipe the seat. That is, unless you don't object to me peeing on your leg.

I need a remedy

2008-10-09T10:09:00.005-04:00

I have this yearning to write. Ideas keep floating into my head about topics I’d like to write about. I have a novel I started a number of years ago which I personally think is vastly entertaining, however…..I’m not really a novel writer. I could probably be a short story writer, but what I love most to write is essays. I’m an essayist. Like David Sedaris only not as funny and not as clever. And not as rich. You know, he recently took a 6-month trip to Japan just because he thought it would be interesting, and he wondered how his writing would be different there? Did you know that he maintains a permanent residence in France along with his number-of-residences here it the States? Yeah, I think I’m a lot like David Sedaris, and I truly hope to be as rich as he is someday.

Except that I’m not that motivated by money.

So, my dilemma is that my doctor wants me to exercise an hour a day which I was doing once upon a time but have now abandoned since the girls went back to school. I abandoned the exercising because they are at a time in their life where they need a lot of support – and taxi-ing (Taxying? Taxieing? WTFE). Also, there is the matter of our house we are remodeling. Chris and I had a serious discussion about it yesterday. We both agree that it is way behind schedule and unless we want to compromise and move into a house that is not finished (which I won’t do), we need to move our ass. Um….since he’s been very effectively moving his ass, it really means I need to move my ass and begin dedicating week-day evenings and week end days to the project. Which all begs the question, apart from the time I steal at work to blog, when in the Sam Hell can I possibly write?

I tell myself, when the kids are out of the house. That’s what I tell myself. Sigh.

Ok, watch now!

2008-10-07T16:51:00.002-04:00

This is a shout-out to my brother who says to raise the flag when he should tune into the Presidential race. Ok, I'm raising the flag! The time to pay attention is now! There is a debate tonight! John McCain will probably lose! If he does, his campaign is over! And then the rest of the world can breathe a sigh of relief! And my whole family will be happy! Except Ray and Cindy cuz they like Republicans! I tend to swing both ways! But I don't like McCain! I think he's dishonest and a crook! And I hope he loses tonight! So tune into the debate! It's tonight! At 9 o'clock! Since you work 2nd shift, you will be able to catch all the re-cap after work and probably the debate too! So watch! Ok!

John McCain, I hope you lose!

2008-09-30T10:43:00.005-04:00

So, the plan was to sail into Washington like Superman and lead the cavalry to the winner's circle, eh? Hm. Looks like the cavalry didn't listen. (Oh, I love to mix my metaphors! Forgive?)

I have to say, love the comment from Boehner (who is a BONER regardless of how he pronounces his name), that Nancy Pelosi's spanking of the Republican party ruined their coalition. They never had the votes to begin with! Nancy Pelosi's an idiot and she was wrong, but the GOP is just using her ill-timed and ill-advised speech as a scape goat. They couldn't whip their votes, and you know what? I think Nancy Pelosi knew it. Why she ever called a vote, I don't know. Political machinations.

Here's another idiot: Barney Frank. Boehner at least had the decency to call for a reconsideration of the vote, and for those of you watching the live coverage, you could hear Barney Frank scream, "Stop! No!" and then after then Chairwoman said that she would consider a motion if brought, Boehner reiterated his request, and Frank said, "Resume business" or whatever it is, meaning he objected, and they go back to other business. And then he had the audacity to blame Boehner and his lack of coalition. Hah! That was political manipulation on Frank's part, plain and simple. He wanted to eviscerate the Reps, and he stopped the reconsideration to do so. What an ass.

Another ass to kick here is Newt Gingrich of whom I have NEVER been a fan. His Contract for America - what a joke!!!!! Would've at least had some credibility despite its wrong-headed assumptions and resolutions if only one or two of the so-called promises ever came to pass. So, guess what ole Newt's been up to? He wants to run for President in 2012, and he was on the news the last week telling everyone he is whipping for Republicans to pass the bailout resolution and that his "saving the nation" coalition of GOPs would be his grand entrance back onto the national political stage in preparation for that presidential bid. As a matter of fact, as the votes were being counted, he issued a statement saying that he had voted for the measure. But what was he REALLY doing? According to report this morning by Andrea Mitchell, she has first-hand knowledge that he was whipping AGAINST the resolution. Sounds like a little bit of political skull-duggery, eh?

Oh, those damn politicians. Fire all of them!

And as for John McCain, I had respect for him for years because he seemed to really care about what was right and would stand up for what was right even when no one else would. However, his political actions over the last three weeks have completely eliminated any respect I had for him and positively convinced me that he has no integrity whatsoever and will do and say whatever it takes to get elected, even if it means contradicting his 26-year track record! Oh, the Ass! The Despot! The Manipulator! I really hope he loses and not by just a little. I hope Obama kicks his ass right into retirement. I hope he is so humiliated he doesn't have the guts to show up on Capitol Hill again.

And as for Newt Gingrich, if he runs for president in 4 years, I will personally do everything in my power to campaign against his election!!!!

Oh, dear...look what I started!

2008-09-09T11:01:00.022-04:00

Ooo...love the comments, everyone! I love the fact that I've gotten everyone thinking about what they really believe in (pat, pat, pat!) and whether they can stomach the evils of two lessers (love the line, hubbyman!)

But....there are MAJOR issues at stake in this election apart from whether a black man or woman occupy executive positions, and I firmly believe that more than at any other time in my personal voting history, involvement - at least from a cerebral standpoint - in this election is absolutely vital to the future of our nation. I hope I am interesting everyone enough to get stimulated! (mentally, of course...garsh!)

I do like Sarah Palin because she stands for something deeply important to me: family. My family means everything to me. However, that does not mean that McCain-Palin automatically get my vote this year. These are the issues that, at the core of my voting heart, will drive my vote: I will be thinking about Britt out there trying to get established financially in her new career. I'll be thinking about Grace and Brandie facing college decisions. I'll be thinking about 8 years from now when Emily graduates from High School - what kind of a world will she graduate into?

The future of our nation as a global power is in question right now...we need a leader who will, as Big V points out, re-establish our leadership in the world as a country that has integrity both militarily and financially.

So, no more pointless wars where diplomacy was not employed first!

No more disregard of the Rules of Engagement: no torturing prisoners, no illegal detainees, and no more first strikes and Shock and Awe!

Americans, let's get out of debt!

Let's hold greedy bank executives accountable for risky loans!

Let's outlaw gratuitous solicitation of credit cards, equity loans and adjustable rate mortgages!

Let's invest in new energy! New technology! Education!

And let's invest in plain old economically sound principles to re-establish our credibility in a world that is continually de-valuing our dollar!

YEAH!!!

Because the needs of this country are so great, I am not yet ready to endorse any candidate. I think there are a lot of questions that need to be answered by the McCain-Palin ticket as the anonymous poster pointed out, and they can't continue to run on his war record and their “maverick” reputations. That's just plain dumb. As for Obama-Biden, I have one word of caution: We need action not rhetoric! Clearly, both camps need to better define where they stand and how their stand differs from the current President and the other candidate.

Like VeeFlower said, we are being courted right now. It is easy to go with your heart and make an emotional decision at a time like this, but anyone who’s been divorced knows that once you say I do, you are stuck with what you picked and what you didn’t know beforehand WILL come back to bite you.

So, I recommend caution and careful consideration in regard to each candidate, and I am not recommending any particular candidate for election. My hope is to put thoughts out there that make others want to get involved and throw their rhetorical hat into the political arena.

Judging from the comments I’ve been getting, I’m hitting that goal pretty accurately! Yay!

Gone, Man, Gone!

2008-09-04T08:40:00.011-04:00

It's the bottom of the ninth, bases are loaded, two outs and the score is tied. The tension in the stadium is so palpable it's as if the air has thickened to sludge prohibiting the merest movement. All eyes are fixed on the batter walking up to the plate. The spectators hush, waiting with bated breath for the first pitch. The pitcher and catcher exchange head shakes-n-nods. There's discord. More fervent shakes-n-nods. The crowd begins to murmur. Finally, as ripples of anxiety course through the stadium, a pitch is determined, and the crowd sighs in relief. But the tension ramps up again as the pitcher takes a step back, winds up and torpedoes the ball toward the batter.

And Gov. Sarah Palin digs in, swings, and knocks that damn ball right out of the park.

The crowd roars!!!!

As Sarah Palin takes her victory lap around the bases, the crowd goes nuts and her teammates rush on the field to congratulate her. But Sarah? Her eyes are right on her family.

It isn't possible that a human being could have watched that speech without being absolutely won over, Republican or not.

I'm not really a patriot, as most of my readers know. But watching her speech last night, and especially the moments after the speech when her family came on stage, I had the rare experience of being proud to be an American. Ok, lump me in with Michelle Obama, fine! But as I listened to that strong, intelligent, gutsy woman and then saw her embracing her family, it really made me feel that she represents the best of what America strives for: good family, working hard and standing up for what is right, not just what is popular. I was so proud to be an American woman at that moment, I got tears in my eyes! (Now don't go tellin' anyone that!)

As I said yesterday, the best hope for a jump-start out of the running blocks was for Palin and McCain both to deliver knock-your-socks-off speeches. So, as the crowd roared and McCain stepped on stage, I was waiting for McCain to deliver the knock-out blow. As he raised the microphone to speak, I was virtually willing him to say, "The doubters questioned my choice of running mate. They said I was crazy. Who's crazy now!? Barack, you may think you can speechify your way to the White House, but I'm here to tell ya, you got another think coming! We're gunnin' for ya, and we won't stop until we're in the White House!"

Instead he said something lame and a final "Look at that beautiful family" before awkwardly standing there not knowing what to do and finally exiting the stage rather abruptly. Not what I expected from a seasoned politician. He should have been poised to fully exploit the moment and drive the dagger home, right to the heart of his opponent.

But he didn't.

Maybe at that moment he was wondering whether his pick of VP will continue to overshadow his campaign, making voters wish she were the top pick, and he were the VP hopeful. Hmmmm....you think?

The reality is, we are not voting Sarah Palin for President, as much as we love her (and believe me, the pundits do love her!) John McCain is the man running for President, and she is just his running mate. After the election, she will be relegated to the near-invisible role of 2nd in command. Is it not well known that all Prezzies fear the usurping power of an overly popular VP? Oh, yes. That is why they are kept well in the background, off in (peaceful, placid) foreign lands smiling while the little cloggers dance and the old politicians shake their hand. As much as we love Sarah Palin, it is John McCain who will be at the helm if elected, and that is a point to reckon with.

Leaning Right

2008-09-03T10:20:00.004-04:00

Well....as for leaning Republican...I am still undecided. As an extreme moderate (huh?), I am a registered "independent" voter and thus confound both parties as to whom will be my pick. I'm a social moderate, an economic liberal (and somewhat anti-capitalist) and militarily, I'm a realist. How's that for lack of political identity!

I think John McCain will have a very tough fight to win over Obama in the election. So far the RNC has been a disaster, looking and sounding more like a Memorial Day tribute than a political soiree. And the pundits thought the DNC was a snooze....!! The Convention is supposed to be the big shot of adrenaline that fires up and inspires the constituents to go out there and campaign for all they are worth to get their candidate elected. Um, that may be a problem since absent from attendance are virtually all of the important Republican leaders. The crowd last night looked more like an AARP Convention than a big pep rally for a dynamic political campaign! Isn't there anyone in attendance under the age of 50? Even I, a political junkie, was so bored I began reading a box of hair dye.

All the boring-ness aside, the message of McCain being The Man for America has been completely overshadowed by Palin and her domestic/political scandals. Of course, there is time for him to turn his campaign around, but I think first he may need to fire his campaign manager and hire someone who can inject a little youth into the campaign, interesting voters other than those who love the war, hate abortion and think we are still the big guy on campus internationally.

Look, I really like McCain. He's been an absolute consummate politician, and I have the utmost of respect for what he stands for. The problem is, he's doing a very bad job of making that case to the voting public at a time when the Democratic Party seems to have finally found an articulate mouthpiece in Obama. That simply spells bad news for McCain, especially after 8 hated years of Bush's policies driving American's to the brink of economic and military collapse. He simply has to do a much better job of distinguishing himself both from Obama and from Bush. Both Obama and McCain are party moderates - despite what pundits say about Obama being the most liberal candidate in recent history - so there is a lot of common ground in their positions. Where differences exist, McCain needs to hard-sell (or sell hard) what it is that distinguishes his policies from Obama's (and Bush's) and why his policy is better. Laying it on thick about his patriotism and war record are not getting the job done. Wake up, McCain, your candidacy is slipping through your fingertips!

However, having said all that....the Convention is still getting underway. Afterall, the DNC had a rather lackluster start in spite of Mrs. Obama's inspirational speech, which had the pundits saying, "Where's the beef?" and "Why aren't they beating the tar-feathers out of McCain right now?" Once Hilary took the stage, the whole atmosphere of the Convention - and the campaign - took on a huge surge of enthusiasm and support, thanks mostly to her husband's popularity and Obama's "historic" speech.

Ooops, back to the RNC: Yes, it is still getting started, so we may see the same surge of enthusiasm and support throughout the GOP after Palin's speech tonight. After all, this woman oozes charisma. If McCain can go on and knock 'em dead on Thursday (following in his worthy opponent's shoes), his campaign has a fighting chance. If either of them bomb, it may be the death-knell to another four years dominated by the Elephant.

Stunning! Clever! Disastrous....Perfect!

2008-08-29T13:03:00.006-04:00

Such in succession was my reaction to the unexpected announcement by Sen. John McCain that his running mate is Sarah Palin, Governor of Alaska.

I had pretty much reached the disastrous conclusion when McCain went on the air today during lunch, making his announcement and introduction of Gov. Palin. I was thinking, “The poor old guy. He’s going to get his ass handed to him on a Democratic platter.”

After listening to an ever-more intriguing introduction, I was more than ready to hear what that firebrand Governor from Alaska had to say. She’s in many respects a female version of John McCain – a maverick who fights big interest, political corruption and partners with leaders of all political persuasions to get things done. However, she brings to the campaign some important traits that John McCain is severely lacking: youth, fired-up enthusiasm, vigor, and most importantly, strong appeal to women voters.

I really, really like this woman. She impressed me right down to my toes, and in the first Presidential race in my voting years that I do not feel like I have to vote for the lesser of two evils, she brings a strong appeal that I find hard to resist. She is an ardent pro-family, pro-life, pro-eduction, pro-ethics woman with an impressive resume of community and political service. She's stared down the big guns of Big Oil, government corruption, a bridge to nowhere and stood up for the common working man and woman with every breath in her body. She's down to earth, plain-spoken yet has the ability to reach you right down where it really matters.

John McCain is an absolute genius for choosing this woman as his running mate.

The addition of Sarah Palin to this political race is an absolute game changer, it will completely shake up the whole arena of this already intense political battle. Oh man, this is going to be interesting!

Already the Dems are sniping about her lack of foreign diplomatic experience and her relative short history in the field of politics. First of all, John McCain has foreign diplomatic experience in spades, so forget that. Anyway, she'll catch on quick, lemme tell ya. Secondly, her accomplishments in the "relatively short" 16 years of her public service have been stellar. Here's a little snippet from her official bio:

"Since taking office, her top priorities have been resource development, education and workforce development, public health and safety, and transportation and infrastructure development.

“Under her leadership, Alaska invested $5 billion in state savings, overhauled education funding, and implemented the Senior Benefits Program that provides support for low-income older Alaskans. She created Alaska's Petroleum Systems Integrity Office to provide oversight and maintenance of oil and gas equipment, facilities and infrastructure, and the Climate Change Subcabinet to prepare a climate change strategy for Alaska.

“During her first legislative session, Governor Palin's administration passed two major pieces of legislation — an overhaul of the states ethics laws and a competitive process to construct a gas pipeline.

“Governor Palin is chair of the Interstate Oil and Gas Compact Commission, a multi-state government agency that promotes the conservation and efficient recovery of domestic oil and natural gas resources while protecting health, safety and the environment. She was recently named chair of the National Governors Association (NGA) Natural Resources Committee, which is charged with pursuing legislation to ensure state needs are considered as federal policy is formulated in the areas of agriculture, energy, environmental protection and natural resource management. Prior to being named to this position, she served as co-chair of this committee."

Oh, John McCain, your choice of running mate is perfect. Absolutely perfect!

What it is....

2008-08-28T14:07:00.005-04:00

Catharsis: According to the American Heritage Dictionary, catharsis can mean "A release of emotional tension, as after an overwhelming experience, that restores or refreshes the spirit."

To say that I’ve been through some overwhelming emotional experiences over the last 10 years would be an understatement – not to mention the huge life changes that have occurred recently. Ironically, it is those very life changes that are my saving grace.

I’m pleased to report that after so many years of heartache and struggle, I am finally happy and healthy – both things I can attribute directly to the presence of Chris in my life. He is the one who encouraged me to seek help for my myriad of psychiatric/personality issues, and if weren’t for him forcing me to go to the ER a few months ago, I wouldn’t even be here (who knew dehydration could be so lethal!?!?) And he is the one who saw through the layers of – oh, shall we say ECCENTRICITIES – to the person who lay untapped beneath. He loved me in spite of my unloveliness and wouldn’t give up on me despite my continual complaining, fit-throwing and overriding desire to just GIVE UP.

So, it is with great relish that I say I am finally feeling better everywhere in my body from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet. My blood sugar is under control thanks to my daily workouts and now that I’ve got a proper diagnosis for the issues that have plagued me all these years (with the corresponding correct medicine), I feel like a new woman.

Of course, our amazing wedding put some giddy-up in my little red wagon (love those mixed metaphors) and helped motivate me to work as hard as I have. Having great kids who really need me to be at my best also keeps me going. But more than anything, it is knowing I get to spend the rest of my life with the man who gives every ounce of himself everyday to making us happy and safe and well provided for, encouraging us in every way, that has really changed my life. Isn’t it amazing what love can do?

And you want to know what? I actually felt like dancing today. Right in my office, right in the middle of an average day, I felt so happy….I just wanted to shake it.

Blood sugar harumphs

2008-08-19T10:05:00.005-04:00

My blood sugar is down over a point on my A1C, which if you know what that is, you know it’s a big deal. If you don’t know what it is, prepare yourself for boredom. It’s the average blood sugar reading over 90 days. So bringing it down a whole point is great and considering I did it in 2 months, even better. My morning blood sugar is now normal (at worst it is in the target range). My before meal sugar is also either normal or in the target range. Unfortunately, in spite of exercising every day, in spite of following (pretty closely) the dietary guidelines, my post-prandial sugar is way too high, averaging in the 225-250 range.

What is so frustrating about this is that if you go online to get recipes or menus for diabetics, they are rife with exactly the kind of foods that cause a spike in my blood sugar. Even 1/3 of a cup of rice with no other carb in a protein/veggie meal will cause a raise in my blood sugar to over 200, so how am I going to eat a peanut butter banana sandwich for breakfast?

I have come to the conclusion that I am very sensitive to carbs, perhaps even more so than the average diabetic. After all, if I am taking my medicine, exercising an hour a day and eating less than 30 grams of carb in a meal, if my blood sugar spikes to over 200, obviously I have overdone it with the carbs.

The last time I saw him (back when he told me I have to exercise an hour a day – ugh), my doctor asked me how many carbs per meal I was allowed by the dietitian. This was my moment of triumph – the one where I got to tell my compassionate, sympathetic doctor how the meanie dietitian only lets me have 30 carbs for most meals and 15 for a snack! Even my dinner meal is only 45 and most adults get 45-60 for each meal! She’s a nazi, I told my doctor. “Really?” he said, “Because I actually think that sounds like an awful lot of carbs to me. I’ve got patients doing 50 per day.” Per day?!??!?

Now add to that the fact that he wants me to lower my cholesterol to below 100 and my LDLs to below 75 in the next year (because, my sweets, diabetics are at such a high risk for heart attacks and I am soooooo young). I can’t complain too much because number 1, he’s right. And number 2, I should anyway. I have a lot of decades to be a diabetic and if I’m not very proactive about reversing the negative effects of diabetes, I probably won’t live as long as my siblings – or my husband. Poor Chris! So, lowering cholesterol also means…..less bad fat, a little good fat. And watching my salt intake! Argh!!!!!

So, take away alcohol, take away sweets, take away virtually all carbs (due to my sensitivity), take away most fats and now salt. I might as well eat the plastic bag my food comes in.

And what kills me is that every diabetic anything begins with the words, “Being a diabetic doesn’t mean giving up your favorite foods, it means learning the proper portion of those foods.”

Uh, I guess that means my portion is zero.

Playing the race card is stupid, stupid, stupid!!!!

2008-08-05T11:16:00.010-04:00

You better believe Obama was playing the race card when he said, “They’ll tell you I don’t look like other Presidents on the dollar bill.” Absolutely! He was garnering sympathy for being black, for not being white, for being different. And you know what? It played well with his supporters. Yeah, they said to one another, they may not say it, but they think it! Now, he turns it on John McCain, accusing him of playing the race card when John McCain responds to the comment. This is one man who plays it both ways.

I love to tell this story about Grace. She was about four years old and she had a baby doll named Alice. Alice was black. We were visiting a friend whose daughter was dating a black man. He was very nice, and wanted to engage Grace in conversation, so he said, “That’s a pretty baby. What is her name?” Grace looked up at him with her sweet, innocent brown eyes and said, “Chocolate.”

I about died.

The truth is, there are some things that are very obvious. Obama does look different. His hair is different, his skin is different, he has blue lips and an odd name. Why is it racist to point these things out? It’s not like we are saying he can’t be president because he looks different. If that was the case, McCain would be out too with his strange tight skin and no-lip mouth. Ew.

The problem is that as human beings, we identify with those that are like us and the first impression we have of someone is a visual one. At the parade on Saturday, I was sitting next to an oriental guy with some tattoos and hip-hop clothes. This lady walks up to him and says, “Can I give you a tract? Do you know Jesus as your personal savior?” He said, “Yes, I’ve been a Christian all my life.” She started to walk away, and I said, “Hey, can I have one?” She handed me one and walked away without so much as asking me if I was saved or not. Why was it that she made the assumption that he was a sinner, and I was saved? Because I’m like her. I’m a white woman dressed conservatively, and he looked slightly gangsta and therefore…..sinner.

So are we all guilty of playing the race card – or shall we say prejudice card – when we look at someone and it registers that they are different? Obviously not. It is not in the observing, it is in the evaluating. This is a distinction I wish media commentators would remember before inflaming a wildly reactive public on a rather touchy subject. After all, this presidential campaign is historic whether you support Obama or not. He's opening the way for African Americans to aspire to all heights, and their community at large is in great need of encouragement in this way. In all actuality, if Obama were more open about the race issue and not use it in an inflammatory way, I think it would only benefit his campaign - and the African American public. It's like when you are pointing out a fat person and you say, the one in the blue shirt. It's a white elephant, people, and we'll get nowhere pretending it doesn't exist.

Powder Creamer

2008-07-29T09:38:00.004-04:00

Powdered non-dairy creamer is to coffee what Busch is to beer. It's the ugly buck-toothed cousin who drools and you can see the food when she eats so no one will sit and eat by her at the family reunion. It is the crustified top piece of bologna. It is the end piece of bread. Looked over, passed by and heartily disdained by foodies of all creed. Oh, no powdered creamer for me, they say! What, you don't have CoffeeMate creamer? No half-n-half? I'll take it black. Black, I say, for no powdered creamer shall pass my hallowed lips! Foodies....hmph!

I love powdered creamer. It is my favorite. I use about two tablespoons in every cup of coffee I drink. It is lovely.....and delicious. Rich tasting, smooth, full of fat I am sure. Yum.

Milk in coffee? How gross. Fancy-pants CoffeeMate creamer? No thanks! Half-n-half? Nope-a-dope. Just pass me the ol' powdered creamer.

Bereft

2008-07-21T14:40:00.004-04:00

I guess I can just thank myself. After all, I am the one who made the statement about my blog not being important or fun anymore. So, I really only have myself to blame for my lack of readership. That and neglect. However, I did find out that I'm getting readers (or clickers only, perhaps) from some place that rates my blog highly. Interesting, considering I haven't been writing lately for the most part and what little writing I have done is, well.....not riveting.

So, am I now bereft of readers, or will the trickle coming from that referring URL save my blog? Ah, it is a question that causes even the angels to weep. Sniff sniff.

Not exactly a patriot

2008-07-16T15:55:00.004-04:00

So, I started sneezing last night. I haven't had allergies in years, so I fluffed it off as some random anomaly. Then, this morning it started again. I feel like someone has held my head underwater and when people speak, only bubbly words come out. As I'm getting my coffee this morning, however, I find out it is all China's fault. Talk around the "water cooler" was how everyone is suffering more from allergies because of all the excess rain lately. Apparently all that rain was caused by the Chinese firing anti-aircraft missiles into the sky trying to get rid of the clouds and rain for the Olympic games, and it is causing a global ruckus in the weather patterns. Thus, all our rain. Thus, all the mosquitoes. Thus, all the mold, pollen and other allergens reeking havoc with my formerly clear sinuses. And let's not even mention Chris's pain in his knees....

Well, all this talk about the Olympic games got me thinking. I remember when I was a kid it was a big deal at our house to watch the Olympics. Part of that was because we got one channel - WZZM TV 13, an ABC channel. What came on ABC, we watched. What was on other channels went unwatched by us (oh, the pain of not having seen the latest "Cosby Show" or "Charles in Charge" episode at the lunch table each week...) Plus, my mom loved watching the ice skating and gymnastics, so she kinda got all of us excited about it.

Having said all that, I have not watched the Olympics in like 12 years. I just do not care. So what happened? I guess the answer to that question lies in why we watch the Olympics in the first place. Sure, when we're kids we watch what channels we have (and if we only have 1 channel, we watch what our parents want to watch.) But now we are adults, so there must be new reasons since we have ultimate control over the other two variables mentioned here. There come to mind two main reasons why adults would watch the Olympics:
1. they love the sport, or at least have some interest in it
2. watching the Olympics and seeing Americans win is an exercise in patriotism; it just makes you proud to be an American.

Ok, well nix reason 1 for me right off the bat. No interest, at least not enough to push one of the multitudes of other urgent items off my plate.

Reason 2? Sorry, folks, but that holds no water with me either. I guess I'm not really a patriot. Have I had moments of feeling proud to be an American? Yes, there have been fleeting moments of pride before the feeling was wiped out by the memory of what a bunch of jack asses we are to the rest of the world. On every major issue, we are either hypocrites (rules apply to THEM, not us) or we just disregard completely what the rest of the world says and do what we want anyway. We consume more energy than the rest of the world while spouting off about green house gasses and what do we do? Throw the kids in the conversion van or the RV or the SUV and head on down the road on nice, hot, ozone-danger days. Or crank up the AC.

Oh, that reminds me of something funny ol' W said yesterday. He was speechifying about the economy when the subject of energy consumption came up and someone asked why he isn't telling Americans to drive less and turn the AC down. His response? "They're smart enough to figure out whether they're going to drive less or not. I mean, you know, it's interesting what the price of gasoline has done, is it caused people to drive less." Later, when pressed on the issue, he began to get a little hot about it, "One way to correct the imbalance is to save, is to conserve. And as you notice my statement yesterday, I talked about good conservation. And people can figure out whether they need to drive more or less; they can balance their own checkbooks." and then he went on, "But my point to you, Mark, is that, you know, it's a little presumptuous on my part to dictate to consumers how they live their lives."

Uh, is that the real issue, Mr Bush, or is it that our consumerism is what makes you and all your cronies rich? Wouldn't want to lose any market share by telling Americans to cut back, why noooooooo..... And that's exactly my point. Why NOT tell people to cut back, why not put our money where our mouth is? Sure, we want to talk about conserving energy as the way out of this mess but is anyone actually doing it?

I heard a report on NPR about a guy in CA that had a little "Green Earth Summit" in his community where there were presenters on how to go green and face painting with kids (soy paint, of course, not that evil petroleum-based paint) and that kind of stuff. His comment (I paraphrase here), "Well, I just wish that people who came were actually doing something about conserving energy instead of all driving their SUVs. I did see one Prius hybrid, though."

Pride? Did anyone say anything about American pride? I'm sorry....I must have been mistaken.

No one likes a know-it-alll anyway.....

2008-07-15T16:31:00.006-04:00

So I tend to think of myself as well informed. I seem to know a lot more about stuff than most people I talk to. That in itself is quite gratifying but doesn't necessarily prove anything. So I happened to pick up NewsWeek or some other newsy-type magazine yesterday and was flipping through gleaning what knowledge I deemed worthy when I ran across a quick on-the-street-survey.

Now, let me premise what I am about to say with this: former surveys I've encountered of the what-does-the-man-on-the-street-know-about-whatever have all made Americans look pretty dumb. You know, stuff like when was the war of 1812? Uh, I dunno, in the 1700s? That kind of stuff. And we all know that people who watch The Daily Show with John Stewart or the Colbert Report are not well informed, they just think they are. Ditto with Rush Limbaugh, Al Franken and others. They talk about the news, but do not necessarily inform (not true, though, of us who listen to "Fresh Air" with Terry Grosse on NPR at lunchtime - very informative stuff).

Anyway, so we all agree on the stipulated premises. Ok, good. Now, just for your information, I watch John Stewart and Steven Colbert, but I get my news from CNN, NPR, Fox News and others. I try to get a variety of sources and compare in my brain the way the story is told on each channel. In other words, I try to stay informed in the real sense of the word.

So, I'm perusing this survey and I'm already in trouble with question 1:
Who is the Chairman of the Federal Reserve? Like 76% of respondents, I remember Alan Greenspan. But he's not there anymore, folks. It's Ben Bernanke. How could I have forgotten that name?
Question 2: Ok, I honestly don't remember the rest of the survey. But it had hard questions in it and what little I do remember involves my brain going, "huh?" and "What was his name again" and silly ol things like that.

So, I guess I'm not so informed. Not really a know-it-all. But what is sooooooo disturbing about that is I am kind of a news-hound. I actually try to learn stuff by listening to the news (so I can recite it later at the slightest opening and bore someone to tears with it....). I try to stay informed, up-to-date and increase my knowledge banks with all kinds of important information. Unfortunately, it looks like when it comes to a lot of the detail-ey things, I'm just not "tuning in." Or is it that news-spewers are so busy giving their opinion of the story, things like who the dang Federal Reserve Chairman is gets glossed over?

Yeah, I think that might be it.

It's all so interesting....

2008-07-11T11:08:00.007-04:00

I've been getting up later and later each morning, but I do take time to listen to the news while I apply the daily face-lift (foundation, eye liner...you get my drift). Anyway, I've been watching this cable news show - channel 59 if you live in GH! - where they mostly talk politics. Well, are we all getting more stupid and petty or is it that there just isn't enough excitement in the political campaigns!?! They just report on the most inane things.

Now, I know you have all heard the flag pin controversy. It is stupid to me that people are saying Barack isn't patriotic because he never wears a flag pin. Well, I'm sorry to say I've never wore a flag pin in my life and I never intend to. How many of those outraged people have worn a flag pin, much less a flag pin every day? Give me a break.

Here's one really good story, though. The Jesse Jackson thing. Oooo, that was naughty! He got caught on mike waiting to get interviewed on some cable news show saying things like "I wanna cut his nuts off" about Barack Obama. Damn! What the hell....Jesse is really getting himself in hot water there. I can just imagine some little intern in the control booth going, 'ooo, I gotta hit the record button and make a name for myself by releasing it to the mainstream media!' Chris says the whole problem with this country is the media and sometimes I agree with him, but when your dream is to be a reporter, you don't really want to agree with that.

Anyway, that Jesse. What a crack ho. But lo and behold, the political pundits on this particular show used it as an opportunity to begin talking about how the emergence of Barack on the national political scene marginalized Bill Clinton and Jesse Jackson, too. That, my people, is why Bill acted like such a donkey's butt during his wife's campaign (not because he's uncouth or too cool to care). And Jesse Jackson's comments? Also provoked by being marginalized by Barack Obama. Come on, people! Get real. I admire Bill Clinton for a lot of reasons, but his lack of personal PR savvy is not one of them. And Jesse Jackson has never made my short list of people I'd want talking about me. He's such a tongue-wagging say-anything. Rather reactionary, like myself.

One interesting thing came out of all the pundit-ing going on in regard to the "marginalization" of the former big wigs in the Democratic Party - the realization that while Barack Obama has become the voice of the new generation Democrats, the Republicans have.....McCain. As it was pointed out by some guy they call Biscuit, Jesse Helms - if he were still alive - could be the "youth" voice for McCain. That McCain.....he's pretty dang old. Myself, if I were to run for President, I'd want to run young like Clinton and Kennedy. That way, I can retire and enjoy decades of philandering and globe-trotting on a nice, cushy government pension. Now, that sounds like fun. Except the philandering. Why, I'd never! I'd just take my honey with me and we'd roll like that.

It's like the Sims

2008-05-23T16:22:00.000-04:00

It’s no secret I’ve roundly ignored my blog of late. Here’s a quick recap of why:

Wedding preparation – weeks of too many things to do
Wedding – culmination of a lot of hard work pays off BIG!!!!
Trip to the ER – Guess who is too young for diabetes? Apparently not me.
American Idol – Office pool wins me $255 if David Cook wins, making me into first-time-ever Idol watcher. If Syesha wins I get $33.50.
WIN!!!!!! - $255 come to mama
Oh, yeah…..thank you cards.
Britt moves home – It’s been fun, but big adjustments. She’s a great kid. Adult.
Bike rides – part of the new “treatment”
Bedtime is 9 – hey, a girl needs her beauty sleep
Quality time with Chris – it’s a short evening after I get home from work and make dinner. Chris and I usually try to do something together after dinner rather than him watching sports and me putting my nose in a book or typing on my blog.

So, no wedding pictures yet, as you can see. Bad Laura! Even still, I wonder what place in my life this blog has with so much else to occupy my time. I know I need to put energy back into my hobbies now that life has slowed down somewhat, but with all the things out there to do that are fun, is blogging really what I want to do? I can say this….the urge to write still hits, but it is not like it used to be where my mind would fill up with words forcing their way out.

It’s like the Sims game. For any of you out there who have never played the Sims, you won’t get this. But for those of you that have….as your Sim’s life ramps up with work and friends and trying to get promoted at work, they come home more and more tired. A lot of red where green should be. One of the biggest areas to suffer is the “fun” meter. Ok, so what do you do for your Sim? You buy the item that has the highest fun rating. If your Sim is tired and bored, you buy a high-fun rating computer and a high-comfort rating chair to sit in while your Sim plays games on the computer. It’s kinda like that. I need high-fun rated activities that don’t involve the amount of time it takes to write. See? I’m not saying I’m done blogging, I’m just saying….this is the priority right now. High-fun.

Beyond dreams

2008-04-15T20:53:00.006-04:00

What amazed me most about my wedding is that even though I wrote the order of service so I knew exactly what was going to happen, nothing could have prepared me for the absolute peace, joy and love I felt from beginning to end. Oh, and what fun we had!!! But I'll talk about that later.

I don't know about you, but I have not lived a fairy tale life. Living the way I have, I never expected life to be blessed, full of good experiences or even happy. That was the stuff of movies and Fannie Flagg books. Yet when I look at my life, the only words that could describe it is blessed, full of people that love me and yes, happy. And I owe every bit of that to my husband, Chris Baldus.

My life has completely changed. The lives of my children have completely changed. And it is all because of this one man. He came home just now and was telling me about what happened when he got called back to work tonight. As I was listening to him talk about it, such a sense of pride and love welled up in my heart and overwhelmed me. Words are so inadequate to explain how incredible it is to be loved by a man like that. He's exactly what a man, a father and a husband should be. With everything I have in me, I love him and am completely devoted to our life together. I will write more about our wedding, but right now I am going to warm up his dinner while he takes a shower. Just a good, normal life. What a gift.

WHY??!?!?!?!??!?!?!??!?! in potty mouth land

2008-04-02T22:39:00.006-04:00

I swear to God, I am losing my effing mind. Ok, I'm a pretty tech-savvy individual. I know my way pretty well around a computer. There isn't a piece of software I can't run from moment 1. It's just intuitive to me. BUT APPARENTLY NOT ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, so I wanted to save money on the wedding. Why spend hundreds of dollars on invitations, I said to myself. I'll just go down to where-the-hell-ever and get some make-it-at-home on the old computer type invitations. You wanna know why it's worth hundreds of dollars to have them professionally printed? Because if you don't, you'll spend hours trying to fix the glitchy wizards or Word templates that came with your damn invitations. And once you have them all jack-ass printed, then you can spend another couple hours putting them together with miniscule squares of ultra-sticky stuff, tying ribbons and trying to attach stupid monograms with a tub chain. You know, the silver little balls connected with the thin wire that you shove through that oval thing? Think old-style tub stopper that was attached to a little ring...oh, forget it.

So that is not the worst of it. How about this? We buy an external burner for our laptop. We buy 20 effing CDs of the correct type. I buy over 100 songs on i-tunes because supposedly you can burn CDs right from i-tunes that will play in any CD player. WRONG!!!!!! It didn't play even on my computer!!! So, I read the manual that came with the burner and I sift through the shit-for-brains i-tunes knowledge center to no avail. What happened, you dare say? Every BRAND NEW CD I put in the burner popped back out with a message: Insert blank CD. KILL!!!!!!!!!! Not to be discouraged (HA!!~~ I NEARLY LOST MY MIND THEN!!) I get an m4p to mp3 converter to convert all those GD i-tunes songs. Done. It only took an hour and a half for 22 songs. Then, I open Windows Media Player and try to burn the kick-in-the-pants CD. What happens?

THE EFFING THING TOLD ME TO INSERT A BLANK CD. HOW MUCH MORE BLANK CAN YOU GET THAN A BRAND NEW EFFING CD!?!??!!??!!??!?!?!?!??!?!?!??!?!?!?

I am never saving money again.

Snarky Idol judges suck ass

2008-03-11T21:30:00.006-04:00

I am SO SICK of hearing the bickering and barbed jabs back and forth between Ryan, Paula and Simon. Ok, I can understand that Simon has no respect for people's dignity, and he stomps all over these brave souls who dare to actually sing in front of him. Part of me says he deserves his comeuppance, and part of me agrees with him whole-heartedly. You tell 'em, Simon! Even still, the negativity of their bickering and sniping at each other is really beginning to grate on my nerves and completely distracts me from what I want to be focusing on: the critique. It's bad enough that Ryan needs to completely dis Simon at every turn, but I seriously thought Paula was going to smack him tonight when he told her to shut up. And I could tell by the way he was looking at her that he was ready to explode. You know, that really sucks. This is a family show, and we watch it as a family. We really don't need to hear that and besides, what do you suppose it is teaching my children? Argue with your coworkers? Hate those who disagree with you? Act ugly just because you don't like how someone said something? This show is quickly becoming non-family fare. Me no likey!

Rock My World

2008-03-07T18:08:00.003-05:00

I know you've been wondering where I've been lately. Well, I started my new job in Holland ata place called Innovation Technologies something - ITC is what we usually call it. I absolutely love my job, my boss is awesome and everyday I make a contribution that makes me feel good. My title is Project/Data Coordinator and that basically means setting up processes and procedures to track production in China. It's very interesting and I enjoy it.

But that isn't nearly the best of it. I got my wedding dress and I feel absolutely gorgeous in it. I just got my hair done and Chris can't get over how "smoking hot" I look. Funny, I thought I was looking pudgy. But by far the absolute best thing that has happened to me is the Bridal Shower and Bride-n-Groom Party my sister threw for me last weekend. They were two separate events (she's so ambitious!). The theme of the shower was a tea party and the decorations were so beautiful and the cake was not only beautiful but delicious, too! And everyone brought me a favorite recipe plus the stuff to make it. I love the idea of cooking family favorites. You know, people used to pass recipes down through the generations. Well, people don't cook as much as they used to, plus they just don't pass recipes down much anymore. I'm really happy that we are changing that with my shower. I sent everyone my favorite recipe along with their thank-you card.

And oh, the Bride-n-Groom party! It was soooo much fun and it was so cool to see my family having so much fun. It made everyone really excited about the reception. We had so much fun. You should have seen Ray and Cindy. They were dancing really funny and having an absolute blast. It is so cool, too, that Chris is a great dancer. We have a lot of fun on the dance floor. I wish I could share some pics because they would have been totally awesome, but I haven't seen any yet. I know Uncle Yoobee got a lot of great shots. You'd think he'd share, but nooooooooo! (hint hint!!)

Well, I have to run because there is more to be done for the wedding. Off I go!

love-love-love

The abuse!

2008-02-21T12:42:00.003-05:00

Picture this: we've all been sick with the flu and germophobe Chris caught the bug last. He stayed home yesterday from work, so I thought, 'Hey, great time to do the wedding invitations!' Chris, being a gentleman to the last, sits quietly on the couch staring at the wall while I fuss and fume at the computer, only barely aware that he is there. His occassional interruptions, "Can I turn on the TV now?" are met with a fierce "NO! You're helping me with the invitations!" Meanwhile, I am furiously balling practice sheets of paper and hurling them all about the living room. Damn printing wizard! And why did we have to get invitations with monogram tags anyway?!?! Finally, four hours later I inform him, "Guess what? We made great progress today! We printed all the invititations and we only have one more address to add to the spreadsheet and then we can run the mail merge and print off all the envelopes!"

"Great," he says, "Can I turn on the TV now?"

He truly is an abused man.

Observation

2008-02-18T13:45:00.003-05:00

Ok, now it's not like I don't know when the wedding is happening. I mean, I helped pick the date! And yet, I still have not begun my diet. I know the shame of having to look at pictures of myself where I am so heavy I look like I'm going to fall out the bottom of the picture. My face puffs up like a big Puff Adder snake and expands exponentially with each gap-toothed grin. Jiggly underams? Check! Bookshelf ass? Check! "Third Hand" stomach roll? Mile-high ass and jelly-roll hips? Check! Check! Check!

You know that commercial where the lady bends over at the fireplace with her red robe on and her kid yells, "Santa!" Pretty funny, huh? Yeah, well I bent over in front of the fireplace, and I hear this voice yell, "Hey, look! Ruben Studdard just came down our chimney!"

You'd think that knowing my blood sugar is frequently sailing into the 500s would motivate me to get on the right track. Unfortunately, I've been sucking popsicles like they are going out of style since getting sick. Hey, it's the only thing that helps my sore throat! And I've never, ever had a sore throat as bad as this has been.

So, what is it that I need to get motivated to lose weight? I have now a little over a month to lose weight before the inevitable picture-taking at the wedding. Help!

Total Freak-Out

2008-02-15T05:59:00.005-05:00

Why another university shooting? I just do not understand a mentality that walks into a lecture hall and begins unloading bullets on a bunch of innocent, unarmed students. After the Virginia Tech shootings, I saw a guy on TV who invented bullet-proof backpacks. At first I was like, what a wacko. But then he explained. He had kids in school and feared for their life. Feared for their life. His school kids.

I could use five of those bullet proof backpacks.

The thought that my sweet, innocent girls could get shot and killed at school is terrifying. Or anyone's kids. Remember the slaughter at the Amish school? This kind of terrorism has to stop.

What is the sickness that drives people to do something like this? Is it the violent movies like "Saw" or video games like Halo that just insulate people against the suffering deaths of other people? Obviously, the kids in the picture here think it's real damn funny to slaughter people. I can't remember who said this, but I learned it in a college history class: you can gauge the health of a society by their art. Whenever a society has crumbled morally and politically and financially, it was first reflected in their art. Whoever it was cited the Roman Empire as an example. And I do believe that art is a reflection of societies' ills (just as it can be a reflection of societies' achievements), which makes us a pretty depraved society.

Why is no one screaming about these slaughter movies marketed to kids from middle schoolers to young adults? My girls keeps talking about how they want to see the movie where if you miss your cell phone call, you're dead. Hellow, they are only 12 and 10! And yet the marketers have found a way to appeal to these young kids. Yeah, indoctrinate them early, and you'll have a customer for life, said Ray Croc with his soon-to-be McDonalds empire. I don't mind so much with hamburgers (they kill much slower), but now it is MY girls and their peers being targeted by those sickos in Hollywood and you know what? I truly fear for their future safety. I know they would never turn a gun on anyone, but who knows what potential wacko is brewing in their midst?

In the violent, unstable world we live in, the only true thing we have to offer our children is faith. We can't predict what future events may strike us, but faith gives us the strength to continue on in spite of the fear, in spite of the violence around us and, God forbid, in spite of it spilling over into our lives. All we can really do, I guess, is pray.

Still, it makes me really mad.

Hillary, beware the Ides of March!

2008-02-13T07:49:00.001-05:00

Shakespeare did a very interesting thing in his play "Julius Caesar." He juxtaposed the conspirators after Caesar's bloody assasination in a scene which teaches a valuable life lesson: when it comes to politics, people may think with their brains, but they'll act in accordance with their emotion.

In this scene, after killing Caesar, Cassius and Brutus stand before the people and deliver well-reasoned speeches condoning the killing and effectively winning over the crowd. People stood around going, "Well, it sounds like they did the right thing." While they are shrugging their shoulders, Marc Anthony leaps upon the stage and begins his famous oratory, "Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears." He rants, he pulls on the consciences of his listeners, he implores them to consider the heinous murder of a good man (arguably so). The listeners become whipped up into a mob that chases Cassius and Brutus out of town and a bloody battle begins.

And with this scene comes the explanation for the force that is Barack Obama. Obama isn't saying anything much different from Hillary, policy-wise, that is. The difference is that while Hillary does a stand-up job of explaining her well-reasoned policies and how she plans to implement them, Barack appeals directly to the places where people are hurting, where they have anxiety, where they fear things may go wrong. He also invokes historical references, inspiring a nostalgic sense of patriotism, whipping people up into a frenzy of emotion. I like what Barack says, but what scares me is that here's a guy with scant political experience on a national stage with a noticable lack of well-reasoned policies and explanations of how he intends to implement these policies.

However, what all of this bodes for Hillary is trouble. Barack is beating her up over her vote for the Iraqi invasion and her "ready to be President on day one" refrain is not hitting home, at least not at the polls. She's a smart woman, but she's facing a growing emotionally-charged movement, and if we learned anything from Shakespeare's infamous scene, it is that emotion wins over a crowd like no other. A review of the 2004 debate between Bush and Kerry is a prime example; Bush was impassioned and appealed to voter's emotions. Kerry was logical and appealed to voter's common sense. The outcome speaks for itself.

So, in politics as in life, emotion is much more motivating than logic, and that is a lesson Hillary needs to learn quickly if she wants to stay in this race.

Forgive!

2008-02-12T12:11:00.002-05:00

Yeah, the post below is a little in your face, but I have to tell you that over the last couple days, every time I get on the road, we have some jack ass with a big 4 wheel drive riding right up our tailpipe. The thing is that people tend to drive as fast as they safely can in weather and road conditions like this. If we are not driving over 30 or 35 miles per hour, it's because we know that with our light little car or our light van that we could not maintain proper control of the the vehicle, particularly in stopping or turning. It just makes me so uptight that they try to force us to go faster by pushing us from behind. Hey, this is not Nascar! It's like that Allstate commercial says, the road is not filled with just drivers, it is filled with families and people like you and me who are counting on getting to their destination safely. Obnoxious behavior like I've experienced over the last couple days is just not called for. I wish people were more considerate of the lives they are putting in danger, damn it! And THAT is why I published that grotesque post below. But you gotta admit, that guy is pretty great, n'est ce pas? He really gets the point across even if it isn't pretty! I'll go back to my nice pictures soon, but for now he has to stay!

Salut!

2008-02-11T17:36:00.000-05:00

I'd just like to send out a big thank you to all the SUV drivers and big truck drivers who think it is *cool* to tailgate people who don't have 4 wheel drive and just aren't driving fast enough with their regular little old cars on these slippery-ass roads. You're the reason families have funerals and little girls grow up without mothers, so here's to you, asshole!

Speaking of Music

2008-02-08T10:48:00.001-05:00

Hey, since we are talking music here, I've got two great finds for you to check out. If you love great music, you will find something to sing about:

Matt Costa: Songs We Sing (no pun intended)

Best songs are "Balad of Miss Kate" (I could listen to that all day), "Sweet Thursday" and "These Arms;" "Behind the Moon" is really cool, too - another all day listener. His sound is really diverse; always melodic, at times folksy or rocksy at others mellow but always, always sounds great. "Cold December" is really good, but don't make it your first listen. Get a feel for him first or you'll think he's a chick-y singer, cuz he's really not.

Jack Johnson: Thicker than water

Bluesy, funky with that spicy island dash that makes Jack Johnson one of my favorite boys, and here he grooves with several talented musicians and balladeers. This is the kind of music that if you hung out with really great musicians (you wish!), this is the kind of stuff they'd jam on improvisationally. It's got that raw sound of pure musicianship. Great tracks to check out are "Rainbow"which is a wicked blues ballad with a Emmalou Harris sound-alike, and "Even After All" has a funky mellow reggae sound. "Honor and Harmony" is a great surprise, so treat yourself and take a listen! There are a few instrumentals on here and normally I don't like instrumentals, but "Hobo Blues" and "Liver Splash" are not to be missed. "The Cove" and "Holes to Heaven" are vintage Jack, so enjoy those, too!

So, take advantage of the streaming audio on-line and take a listen at amazon or itunes. You'll thank me!

Songs for the wedding

2008-02-07T11:07:00.000-05:00

Ok, I want my reception to be KICK ASS, so I'm starting to compile a list of must-have songs for it. Alright, I've been compiling a mental list of must-have songs for over a year now, but I'm just now getting down to actually making a real list, so I know I've forgotten a lot of songs I wanted to have! Dang it! So, I'm going to put down some of the ones I can remember, and you guys let me know what I've forgotten - or just what you'd like to hear! ;) Some songs may not work out, so if you see something that pulls a red flag, let me know! I'm trying to keep it mostly songs that people either already know or will (hopefully) love instantly. And dont' forget - A. Val's doing an accoustic "Thank You" by Led Zeppelin with Marty, which to me will be the show stopper. How I will make it through that song without crying, I do not know.

For the slow dancing:
1. Live Like You Were Dyin by Tim McGraw (This song reminds me of Chris)
2. Tupelo Honey by Van Morrison (our song)
3. Everything by Alanis Morrissette
4. Unlonely by John Prine (our wedding song)
5. Ramble On by Led Zeppelin (our fave song by LZ, but it's a toughy - slow or fast song?)
6. Let's Get Together by the Youngbloods
7. For What It's Worth by Buffalo Springfield
8. Fade Into You by Mazzy Star
9. Everything Is Cool by John Prine
10. One Thing by Finger Eleven
11. Love's Divine by Seal (accoustic version)
12. Better Together by Jack Johnson
13. Change by Sean Kingston
14. You Don't Know How it Feels by Tom Petty
15. Thank You by Led Zeppelin
16. Little Star by Steena Nordenstram or something like that
17. Cruisin by Smokey Robinson (or should we do the song from 'Duets'?)

For the fast dancing:
1. What I Got by Sublime
2. Good Times, Bad Times by Led Zeppelin
3. Sexyback by JT (I LOVE this song!!!!)
4. Ain' No Other Man by Christina Aguilera (my song to Chris!)
5. The View by Modest Mouse
6. I'm Your Captain by Grand Funk Railroad (just cuz it's a cool song)
7. Whole Lotta Love by Led Zeppelin
8. Jessie's Girl by Rick Springfield
9. Sheep Go Heaven, Goats Go To Hell by Cake
10. Mrs. Robinson by the Lemonheads
11. Casey Jones by Greatful Dead
12. Just Lose It by Eminem
13. Beverly Hills by Weezer
14. Fortunate Son by CCR
15. Spirit in the Sky by Norman Greenbaum
17. Land of 1000 Dances by Wilson Pickett
18. Mr. Brightside by the Killers
19. Fergalicious by Fergie
20. Canned Heat by Jamiroquai (think Napolean Dynamite)
21. Sweet Home Alabama by Lynyrd Skynyrd
22. Are You Gonna Be My Girl? by Jet
23. Goldigger by Kanye West and Jamie Foxx!!!!!
24. Respect by Aretha Franklin
25. Run It! remix by Chris Brown and Bow Wow
26. My Humps by Black Eyed Peas
27. Girlfriend by Avril Lavigne
28. The Joker by Steve Miller Band
29. The Weight by The Band

I think I may have too many songs. But....here are MORE songs I love but are not very well known. What do you think? You can check them out on i-tunes without buying by double clicking the song.
"I'm the Man Who Loves You" by Wilco
"Kundalini Express" by Love and Rockets
"Local God" by Everclear
"Sweet Potato" by Cracker
"Song 2" by Blur
"Been Caught Stealing" by Janes Addiction (or I have a great live version of "Jane Says")

I know there are great songs out there I just can't think of right now, but I know I got a few winners here, as well! But PLEASE, let me know if I missed anything!

A Man's Man!

2008-02-07T10:59:00.000-05:00

Personally, I think he looks better in his uniform - er, apron, I mean! :)

Braving the Elements

2008-02-06T13:10:00.001-05:00

Today I actually braved the elements to get you these pictures. It is the same old crap - snow! snow! snow! When will it ever stop?!?!? I can't wait for spring and this is what I get! Anyway, I wanted to give you some new views of the hell-frozen-over we are living in here, so I actually put my boots on and went outside. Brave! This view here is from the back deck looking toward the front of the house. It is snowing pretty profusely which is why it looks sorta fuzzy. Either that or I moved or something.

You can really see how hard it is snowing in this picture. The visibility is down to a quarter mile as you can see from the background. I was going to take the girls to the pool to swim today, but the roads are really bad. One thing we've noticed over the past couple years is that winter starts later every year and lasts longer into the spring. If we are right about this, we may just have a frigid-cold wedding day! Stupid snow!

Just to tantalize everyone with visions of a warmer time, here is a pciture of our roses and dogwoods from last spring and summer. Ah, to be warm again!

A New World

2008-02-05T00:20:00.000-05:00

My life is different now. Part of it is being in love and being loved, truly loved, in return. I feel loved. It is a hundred different things. The way he looked at me today and said, "Honey, this food is killer." It's the way he said, "Oh, that feels sooo good." when I casually rubbed his shoulder. I'm not trying to be all Valentinesy-romantic here, but when you are in love there are a thousand things that transact in a day that say, "You are worthy, you are a good person, and I love you." My soul needs that.

Did Chris save me? Absolutely without a doubt. He saved me, but not in the way you might think. I had been single and alone for much of my adult life. The thing about being single and alone is that you can continue all the dysfunctional crap and there's no one there to confront you, there's no mirror reflecting back what your behavior is doing to those around you, the ones you love. Chris was that mirror for me. Living with someone who spends every waking moment working his heart out for the people he loves and is responsible for is confronting, especially when you are used to just plain having it your way all the time just because you want it that way. He is such a good person, he made me want tobe better, too. I had a lot to learn.

The reason I am saying all of this stuff is because I'm in a very different place in my life and that change is reflected in this blog. This blog began at a time in my life when I was very confused and very conflicted, and I was making things tremendously worse by staying involved in a bad situation, trying to figure out a way to make it work. When I read the manic posts written during that time, I can remember the torment twisting my guts every waking moment and the anxiety that never let me rest. It was hell.

I'd like to go back and erase those posts, but erasing those posts won't erase that part of my life. It is part of my story now, and like it or not, I'm stuck with it. Now, though, when I sit down to write I'm not driven by the terrible feelings I had back then which stirred my mind up into a mental frenzy of words and emotions which fell into place like stout little soldiers marching into battle; each blog post was just one more attempt to validate myself in what was ultimately a soul crushing time in my life.

Now, I sit down to write and my words are different. Don't mistake this post as a declaration that I've arrived and that I no longer struggle. Oh, I struggle. But for me struggling is part of my human condition; I have no life apart from struggle. It's just that now I focus on different things. My family is everything to me. When I sit down to write, I'm thinking of that funny thing Emily did or how Grace and Brandie are growing into such beautiful, intelligent young girls and how thankful I am every moment of my life that I have such an incredible life partner in Chris. This is healing to me. This is bringing me back to my soul and it's drawing together all the dissociated, broken parts of myself. I have a vision now of who was hiding inside of me all these years, and you know what? I am so excited. Now the question is, will I have the courage to become the woman I was meant to be? You will have to tune into this blog to see. But I'm guessing that with the love and support of the best man on this earth, I can do anything. Anything.

Slip of the lip

2008-02-03T14:08:00.000-05:00

If I said to you "Let's do it Tuesday," you should know I meant Thursday, should you not? In my brain I said, "Thursday," but my mouth said, "Tuesday." A simple slip of the lip.

Here's another one. Let's say I walk into your office one morning, and I say, "There's something wrong with the copy machine. It's making strange noises and no coffee is coming out." Ok, now that one is obvious. Coffee machine, idiot! No reason to ask me if everything is ok at home.

This one is the worst. Imagine a romantic moment of absolute bliss. In a delirious haze you say,

"heaven."

Ok, I don't know why you said it, but just imagine you did. Now, don't you think it's weird to hear, "Who's Evan?"

Do you think this could be related to random turning? I know someone - I'm not saying who - but this particular someone, while driving, will make random turns. Say you're going to the store. Going there requires a straight shot down Comstock. Well, for some reason, this person would turn on, let's say, Ferris or something. Startled, you say, "Hey, why'd you turn this way? I thought we were going to the store." Jolted from whatever mental detour she'd been traversing, she says, "Oh. We are. I don't know why I turned there." That's somewhat strange, doncha think?

But undoubtedly the best of all is this: Let's say you are friends with a couple for a long time. Like several years. One night you are at their house along with a large group of all your friends and you want to pray for this couple. The couple whose house you are at. The couple you've known for years. Ok, so you start out really well, "Dear Lord, please help.....um....." and your mind goes completely blank! Names? Who knows. Your mind frantically searches and come up with nada, "Yeah, please help uh...." Luckily, your good friend, the guy, chimes in, "Brian and Sue...!" Yeah, that's embarassing. But at least they weren't mad at me. Not like the time I got excited because I saw a friend drive up, and I said, "Hey, look, Gloria's here!" Everyone gets excited because Gloria was there, but in the door walks Victoria. I meant Victoria, but for some reason I said Gloria. Everyone laughs it off, but strangely enough.....call her Gloria for the rest of night on accident. Gloria/Victoria didn't seem to enjoy our little slips of the lip as much as we were. Unfortunately for her, this bad habit was catching with our church friends; about half the congregation started doing it. Victoria and I had always been good friends, but I know that after the Gloria incident wound down, she still wondered why I did it. Hey, it was just a slip of the lip.

Just sayin.

It's so nice to have a man around the house!

2008-01-30T11:28:00.001-05:00

Chris was in the kitchen working away at the bacon for our BLTs the other night (he's the baconator) when I whirl around the corner and get a load of this vision! Hey, whoever said a man can't sizzle in the kitchen?

;)

Don't be jealous, girls. I did the clean-up!

Strange Days

2008-01-30T11:17:00.000-05:00

I spied on my neighbor this morning (10x optical super-zoom, hellow!). He is the barely discernable blur in front of the headlight beam. This is what he was doing - shoveling a little walkway for his beloveds in case they had to step toe outside the house. Doesn't look like fun, does it? And on his way to work, too. My across-the-street neighbor was snow blowing at 5:41 this morning. Hmph! I can't be too mad, though. His wife Kristen leaves very early for her daily Grand Rapids commute. And poor Chris? He was trying to get the frozen door unstuck on the car. Hm...shoulda parked in the garage, n'est ce pas? The views below demonstrate the extent to which I am willing to brave the elements to bring you late breaking views of the wintry weather. The amount of snow on the front porch - and my door! - attest to the blizzard-y conditions!

Some of my favorite pics

2008-01-28T01:09:00.001-05:00

I'm trying to write a blog post about the fascinating world of the presidential primaries, but my thoughts aren't coming together, so I thought I might regale all of you with some of my favorite pics over the last couple years. Remember, you can click on each of these pictures to view them full size. So, here goes....This first picture is a favorite because as all the kids at Emily's talent show were giving a final bow, they were all distracted by something on the floor. It was the little girl who sang "Somewhere Over the Rainbow." What is so cute about it is that I just happened to snap the pic as all the kids turned their heads to find her flat on her stomach. How that happened when all they were doing was taking a bow is beyond me! Emily is right up front there with the black dress on. She looked so beautiful that day!

I love this picture of Brit and Robbie on the day Britt graduated from Grand Haven High School. We were sitting at the very top of the back of the auditorium that day (I sat slam-blam right next to Chris's ex-wife Sundy and boy, was it HOT), and when the Principal called Britt's name, Chris yelled loud enough for the whole auditorium to hear, "Britt, you rock!" Everyone laughed. Later that day we had a joint graduation party for Britt and Robbie at our house (Robbie had just graduated from CMU). Now Britt is almost finishing up her radiology studies at Baker, and Robbie is almost done with her graduate work at Western. We are very proud of these girls!

Here are the cousins at the graduation party. I love this picture because Sam, who is decidedly somewhat goth, has her mother's grace and can't hide it with her princess wave. That is her brother Dan standing next to the table. And their parents - Chris's brother Johnny and his wife, Amy are to the right here. This is right before they moved to California, and we've all missed them terribly. We are hoping they can all come back for the wedding. The only time we've seen them is when they flew home for Chris's sister's funeral. We'd much rather see them at a happy time - and God knows, our wedding is going to be the party of the century!

Here are a couple pictures from Robbie's graduation day over at CMU. The picture with the two girls includes Robbie's roommate Emily and her other friend whose name I have forgotten. Robbie sure is a striking young woman. The other picture is Robbie hugging her Grandma (Chris's mom) right after she exited the auditorium. It was an emotional moment. You can also see Chris's dad in the background of that picture, almost like I framed it that way. Such a photographic genius, I am!

I love every picture of Chris with little Gabby. Gabby is his ex-wife's sister's daughter. Because they all lived with Chris and his family, he was there when Gabby was a baby, and he was incredibly close to her. It is really sad that he almost never gets to see her anymore. Divorce is just the worst. He misses Gabby like crazy, but every time he sees her, she just runs for him as fast as she can yelling, "Uncle Chris! Uncle Chris!"

I just can't resist another picture of Chris and Gabby. This picture is on my mantle, and it makes me happy every time I look at it. For one thing, did you get a load of how handsome Chris is? Hellow!

As you can see, pumpkin carving is a lot more fun than you remember! Every year we each carve pumpkins and then take a ton of pictures of them out on the front porch. This year was really warm and the pumpkins all melted down well before Halloween, which was too bad because we had some awesome pumpkins! We're all pretty creative and artistic, so honestly, our pumpkin viewing is quite a treat. The pictures, though....not so much. I've never been able to get the lighting right to really see the pumpkins in all their glory. Darn it all!

Another holiday tradition is that we all decorate for Christmas. This year I told Chris I thought our house looked more like a Christmas novelty shop than a house. He really likes his decorations! This picture isn't so good because I had the camera on the wrong setting on accident and Grace and Emily are blurs, but you get the general idea. We really enjoy doing this together as a family. By the way, the "little girl" next to Chris is Britt! When we worked together last year, I used to tell everyone to as her if she was a dwarf or a midget! :)

Here is my rumpled old family on Christmas morning last year. Oh, Britt and Robbie would kill me if they knew this picture was being posted on my blog! But I just love their puffy faces and their kinked up hair. Trust me, that's not something they let the world see too often! I can't believe how young Grace, Emily and Brandie look in this picture! My, how they've grown! Just wait....you'll see!

More favorites

2008-01-28T01:00:00.000-05:00

Here are Brooke and Paige at the Easter Egg Hunt last year at Ray and Cindy's house. It was really funny because the older kids picked up certain colored eggs, all of which contained - not candy - but chores! In order to get out of the chores, the kids had to successfully complete a number of challenges. One of the challenges was they had to take a test (multiple choice)! Brandie got the most points on the test because she put "poop" as her answer every time it appeared. And apparently, poop was a popular correct answer! Ray would know, though, because he's the one who made up the test. Just tells you a little something about him, doesn't it?

Grace was in a play last year, "The Emporer's New Clothes." It was really funny and clever and here she is with her two friends, Samantha and Lauren. Grace's part was the mother of Lauren, who played Peter, the golden-tongued tailor who sold the king a bill of goods. Grace had been in hot competition for the lead female position, that of queen, but it was given to Jamie Hoogeboom just because her dad was a pro football player and is a local hero because he was on "Survivor" (he lost!). Anyway, the director wrote in a part for Grace because he thought she was so good. Ok, ok....sour grapes!

These pictures are from Grace's graduation from 5th grade into middle school. Here she is with her friend, Samantha. Unfortunately, this year Samantha has been trying to get into (ugh!) Jamie Hoogeboom's group of friends and has sort of left her old friends behind. Middle school, anyone? Grace hasn't minded too much since she's made a lot of new friends this year. But Samantha was a good friend to her last year, and as soon as she realizes things aren't always greener with the "popular" kids, she'll be back. Or so I think.

There's that man of mine! He's mugging with his new polarized sun glasses as he heads out for fishing. Don't ask me what he did to his arm....that man is constantly hurting himself (usually working). Although....we can't forget the hook incident last summer. I came home from work and Grace ran out of the house, "Did you hear? Chris is at the hospital!" I nearly fainted. Apparently his friend Brooks (!) had stuck him really well with a big nasty bait lure right in his knuckle, right in his bone. But this cast I think is from when he did something to his tendons working on the....lawn mower? I love that man of mine!

Here they are, almost all grown up! Could there be anything as momentous as the first day of middle school? The girls were jittery, but judging by how they are doing, middle school is the best thing that ever happened to them. My, how times have changed, huh? Here is a picture of Emily on her first day of school this year, too. She has thrived this year, mostly because she can enjoy herself without worrying about Grace, and what she might say about it. Luckily for us, all three girls get along extremely well (except for that ever-present sibling rivalry between Grace and Emily.) Oh, in case you didn't know, Grace is going by Anna this year at schoool. Now that she's all grown up, you know! ;)

And this year has also brought.....the Buc Blaster! This is what they call the middle school dances here in "Buc" territory. Here are some pics from some really giggly girls before embarking! The first pic includes Kaylie, Brandie's friend. The second pic is of Grace and her friend, Sandra. You can read all about their adventures on Grace's blog!

Here is how Emily felt about not going to the Buc Blaster. That kid kills me!

Not nearly done with the favorites.....

2008-01-28T00:41:00.000-05:00

Course you'd like to think that I'm going to run out of pictures any time now. Well, think again! Here come some more favorites!

We LOVE Halloween at our house and here we are again, doing our best to scare the pants off the poor little tikes Molly and Kendall across the street. Boooo-ey pumpkins! Mine is that awesome one at Emily's feet. C'est moi!

We had a BLAST on Halloween night. We invited everyone over here to trick or treat and had a house full of ghouls and goblins - and their kids in great costumes! Watch out, or Paige is going to kill you with her magic wand! The blonde next to Grace is her friend Molly, and just so you know, Grace's costume was the absolute bomb. She was a punk witch and my mom made her costume from scratch (along with Emily's medieval princess costume). I did all the makeup....you can send your congratulations on my excellent artistry in the comments below. :)

Here are all the girls again on the night we put up Christmas decorations this year. I gave you a close up so you could see all of their bright, shining faces instead of another shot of the living room, which is basically the same setup as last year. The girls were a little spoiled this year with each of them getting mp3 media players, and Britt with a handful of gift cards - her favorite! Jewelry was the close second this year with all the girls. We needn't be surprised!

Ok, this is the last....

2008-01-28T00:02:00.000-05:00

Ah! Here is a picture I forgot above! It is a picture of Chantze killing his two (princess) sisters. It was a lovely moment. Paige appears to be preparing to give him the what-for and a sobering clob with her magic wand. Dang, that night was fun! Now I can't wait till next year!

Here is my honey all dressed up for New Year's Eve. We ended up having a wonderful night and even though Chris says my picture is beautiful, I'm not smiling and I look stoned, so I'm not posting that picture. It is definitely not a favorite! But, just to be nice I decided to post this picture of us from last fall. We had both just gotten out of work and dang if we don't look tired! I still like the picture though....primarily because it is not a body shot of me. P.S. check out that cute picture of Emily over Chris's shoulder on his NYE pic. Isn't she cute?

Birthdays, birthdays, birthdays! Can you guess who is celebrating their special day below?

Hints: Brittt was 19, Brandie was 12 and Emily was 10. Now can you guess?

I don't know if you can tell, but I'm starting to get sleepy. It's not really 12:02 AM like it says below...I have to edit that to make my blogs appear in the order I want you to view them in (instead of the order in which I created them.) In actuality it is 3:16 AM and I am about to keel over with exhaustion. There are some pictures I took around the house our first spring here, but I'm too tired to post them now. I'll post them tomorrow. Or the next day.

Snow Head

2008-01-24T21:31:00.000-05:00

So, Emily comes inside from playing outside with our neighbor Brian. I was busy cutting up veggies for tacos, and Emily asked if she could help. Sure, I said. I slid the cutting board over and let her go at it. That was when I first got a good look at her.

Emily sat there happily cutting up the tomato, and perched atop her cute little head is a pile of snow. Yes! A pile of snow! As she had only been in the house a couple mintues, it hadn't started to melt yet, and she couldn't feel it. I immediately began to laugh uproariously and told her to hold still and don't move a muscle. I ran and grabbed the camera and snapped these two cute pictures of my lil darlin. At the point where I took the picture, she still did not know she had a pile of snow on her head. When she saw the pictures I took, she started laughing really hard and ran over to the sink and brushed it off. What a kid!

Room with a View

2008-01-24T21:25:00.000-05:00

Here are some of the views we've been enjoying with the recent snowfall. Chris took the outside pics since I couldn't bring myself to brave the elements. I know the pics of our back deck aren't all that interesting, but I couldn't get over how high the snow was piled on the railing. This was actually taken a couple days ago, and we've accumulated another 6" or so. Enjoy!