Quit yer cryin

Tears have been a part of my life every day now for the last six months. Today is the anniversary...my honey died six months ago. It seems like six days! I can remember him, almost hear his voice when I think of it...I still have his deoderant in my bedroom because it reminds me of when he would get out of the shower and he was always so good smelling. Even when he would work hard and get dirty that man never smelled stinky. He didn't have stinky breath (it was peppery, even in the morning), his sweat didn't stink (it was salty smelling). He didn't stink up the bathroom or pass noxious smelling gas...he was a pure soul, I'd like to think. He loved passionately, worked hard physically until the day he died, and no matter what he was doing, he had fun. Even his temper was like this pure spark popping off...when it was gone, the air was crisp and fresh and I felt cleaned out. It's funny when I think of it now...in eight years I never had that horrible realization that I was with a man that I could not bear. Oh, we had our fights, lemme tell ya! But never did I ever look at him and think, wow, I can not bear that man. His best friend said to me in an email today, he made everybody do right. And he did. He feels like he is a better person having known Chris. Amen, I say, that was the essence of who my honey was...doing the right thing, not preaching, not telling others what to do, just being a really, really good role model to the people around him. Dio vi benedica, il mio miele. God bless you, my honey.