I have had only two submissions in my goofy word definition contest, a feeble display of loyalty, I must say. Now, unless I have more entries, I have the difficulty of choosing my mother as winner, in which case I could be accused of favoritism, or disappointing the mother by choosing the definitions of the unknown poster to my blog known only as DCvR. Not a good position for your gifted writer to be in.
Perhaps the problem is a lack of motivation. After all, my own mother scoffed at the idea of me writing her a poem. So, I am going to up the ante. Due to the low morale evidenced by the lack of response and disparaging comments regarding my former offer of a prize (and by my own mother, no less), I am declaring a new prize for the winner!
The new winner of my goofy definition contest can PUBLISH to my BLOG!
Yes, they too can be a published writer on the world's only blog dedicated to spreading the joy of narcissism! Do not underestimate the unique niche occupied by this blog in today's belly-button inspecting, over-analyzed society. No where else will you be encouraged to brag, feel so damn good about yourself you could do cartwheels, give everyone else a piece of your superior mind and tell everyone else how to improve their sorrowful little lives all in one witty and devious little post!
So, don't delay, dear readers. I am going to pull the plug on this bane-of-a-contest quite soon. So, get busy!
Love,
your (somewhat) dedicated writer
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
12 comments:
I'm in! But, uh, I don't quite get it, we define four words with like, made up stuff? Man I'm too dumb to be reading your blog.
(don tell her I said this, but u should choose your mom...)
Yes, Daddio, you must make up your own definitions to my chosen words.
:)
Be funny. My blog needs a humor boost.
Pendulous - Headlice forthcoming
Bulbous - A bloated, untrue story
Refrain - Healthy breakfast cereal
Titan - When your belt gets too loose
-the (unimaginative) dad
I laughed,I laughed! The head lice forthcoming...yes, I see it now! Lice that are pending...I love it. As for publishing to your blog, bj, isn't that what we are doing now? (Duh)
P.S. I did not mean for that last remark to sound derogatory.
Oh, mom...there is a HUGE difference between being able to comment on my tres intelligent ramblings versus creating tres intelligent ramblings of your own. BRO - GOOD JOB ON THE DEFS! I liked REFRAIN. That one showed a GREAT deal of creativity.
Oh, and mom...don't call me "bj." It doesn't sound quite right for my mom to call me that. My boyfriend, ok. Mom....no.
Har har! I got you with the bj...good job, I wondered if you would notice and you did! I read Shortesweet's blog today and you wrote about curling up with a book when the other kids were off having an adventure...does a footprint in the cement on top of the hill count as an adventure, huh?
Ok, Laura, here you go......
Pendulous – used to describe emotional activity when one is being visited by one’s Aunt Flo.
Bulbous – You know, I hear this word and that zipper scene from Something About Mary flashes into my mind. “How’d you get the beans above the frank?”
Refrain – Lip Zipper. Invented after one too many helpings of shoe.
Titan - Favorite nicknames men use to identify “the little guy”
On a side note, in Greek Mythology, Titan was the son of Gaea and Uranus…a family of giants. That reminds me of the show Jack Ass on MTV where they visited a town called Mianus, PA. So they walked around the city saying things like “there’s a post office in mianus”.
Yes, I am 12.
LOL! Go for the throat, Uno, go for the throat. No one likes that geek-faced weasel anyway. You could actually make Jeopardy cool again (Headline: Cinci IT hunk dunks weasel-faced ass, Jennings, winning title "All-Around Titan").
Melly, I may have to refrain from the pendulous emotional activity when I finally get a man whose bulbous lip zipper intimates he might be sportin a titan!
Loved the defs, Cinci, and I must say, you've seriously upped the competition! No longer does a home court advantage extist....good job, and thanks for playing!
Someone has played Balderdash one to many times..ok...so here are some good definitions from the past:
Pendulous: A pair of chickens.
Bulbous: A poodles engorged penis.
Refrain: To lick ones lips and stare vacently in a comatose state.
Titan: the word found on a board that washed up on shore a few decades ago.
Jamie play-ed, Jamie play-ed! You have NO IDEA how much coercing it took her to participate. Damn yankee.
One of those definitions was mine from a former Balderdash game. Can anyone guess which one it is? (No fair "guessing" if you were there and remember!)
Post a Comment