To tell the truth, I've been down. Not writing on the blog has been part of that. Not being able to talk to my best friend is part of that. And with my grandmother dying last week, I have been doing a lot of thinking about how I'm living.
Grandma loved it when I would post to my blog. Of course her favorite posts were the ones with pictures of the kids or cute stories highlighting what *unique* and *vibrant* children they are. But regardless of what I wrote, she was a fan and loved to post comments chiding me about my polarized world view. I loved that about her! But...life got busy, and our computer at home had a virus, so I just quit posting. And then Grandma died. I looked back at her last post to my blog: "Pleeeeeeease update!" Drawn and quartered in my soul, I was. Guilty. Bad. Neglectful. Dare I say selfish?
I don't want to lose another person in my life having to wonder if they knew how much they meant to me. I don't want to let go of things that bring meaning to my life just because I haven't gotten the upstairs bathroom cleaned and *should* get the work done before having fun.
Life is about LIVING. About experiencing life. I'm so caught up in whether or not I've sorted through every paper in each child's back-pack that I'm letting important things go in my life. Like relationships. Like my writing. And this blog is an important part of how I am developing my writer's voice. So, I guess what I'm trying to say is.....this blog is here to stay, bunnyjo fans! Now...if I can just get my pisse et vinaigre back.....