Back in the 50's or the 60's or the 70's when birth control was invented, it spawned the inception of the Sexual Revolution. Up until that time, men could pretty much have sex with impunity. It didn't show. They could have sex with five different girls, notch up their belt or their bedpost, brag about it and everyone would slap them on the back. A woman, however, didn't dare. Why, what if she got pregnant? Her rapidly-expanding belly would tell the story of her deteriorated morality. The slut!
But, lo....the condom or IUD or birth control pill or whatever it was got invented. Suddenly, women could have sex with the same impunity that men had enjoyed thoughout the history of Man-as-Race. Yay! Now women can have sex with five different men, notch up her belt or bedpost and brag about it. She may not get a slap on the back, but one on the rear cheek hints that another notch is due in short order. Yay for women!!!!!
But that whole chaos theory threw a wrench in. Cuz sometimes that ol' birthcontrol don't work! (My OB told me flatly that condoms fail 75% of the time within the first year when used as the only method of birth control - and now we have Emily!) Oh, and other times....when that birthcontrol didn't work....that ol' guy you banged back behind the bowling alley didn't wancha. Or the baby you are carrying. And he even had the audacity to say it might not be his! After all, what with all that sexual revolution going on and all the notches on your bedpost. Hm. He might have a point!
Oh, and let's not even get started on herpes and other forms of sexually-transmitted diseases. Hey, did you know a condom won't protect you from AIDS when you are giving your boyfriend a blowjob? Just thought I'd mention it.
You see, having sex with impunity as far as diseases and pregnancy goes does not remove the hardship or pain or humiliation or difficulty with sexual relations by a long shot. Because shit happens. Diseases get transmitted and babies get made - not to mention the emotional entanglements. And when you equate having sex with playing X-Box or seeing a good movie (i.e. just another way to have a good time), you get a little sloppy about who you are having sex with. You are not thinking about having to look at that person over the breakfast table 35 years from now. You are not thinking about how the fact that he violated probation and had to go back to jail (oh, but those cops had it in for him!) might affect the way he is/is not capable of helping you raise your love-child together. Yeah, you are pretty much not in thinking mode, merely in feeling mode.
And the fall out of all this is the rampantly-growing number of single parents working all day long to try to get enough money to raise their children while some daycare place or neighbor does the actual raising. And the absent parents - do they think of the impact on the children? Or are they too busy thinking about who they will have sex with sans impunity next?
I think that this conversation has a direct bearing on the conversation below, regarding race. Well, not the race aspect so much as the lack-of-child-rearing evident in our society at large. Why is there the logical disconnect between having children and not raising them? Why don't we see the correlation between rising numbers of unwed mothers and rising numbers of juvenile delinquents? Human beings will always have problems with delinquents, but not having a good set of parents around to correct them will likely increase the number of delinquents, right?
Ah, there is so much to say about this question and it is all so controversial. So, as time is short and I am curious what you-all think, I'll let you say the rest. Have at it!
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Okay, I'll jump in. Add the divorce rate to the unwed mother rate and you have even more un-parenting. Don't bother telling me some single/divorced parents are excellent, I know that. It's just that most aren't because they are forced to work and "give it all" to their job and staying sane. Parents today are not "engaging" their children, that is, taking an active interest in everything that comprises the family/school environment and how it affects the kids...and giving them enough attention. Too many kids are being raised by tv, their friends, video games, and the general culture. (SHUDDER)Parents know this, they just don't know how to change things. All I know is that if people don't start paying attention to what is really going on their kid's lives there are going to be some grieving parents out there. Huffing and the choking game are two activities it would be good to be educated about, to begin with.
I agree! The lack of connectedness between kids and parents is frightening. Huffing and the choking game are ways of getting attention. When I was in middle school, it was playing "chicken" - you'd rub an eraser on your skin for as long as you could stand it. The person going the longest obviously won. I remember Kerry Jancek having ugly burns and scars on her arms and hands from that game. I wonder if her parents noticed.....
I just think that the level of responsibility has dropped to an all new low. Think about all the young kids that are getting pregnant, some STD, or sadly sometimes both. These are people that have little to no responsibility or possibly no respect for life either.
These are the kids that have sex just "for a good time" instead for what it is intended for.
To back up my point think of the people that are having children. How many are planned? How many parents do you think are ready for that?
We are living in a scary world. A world where the children are becoming parents before they get a chance to grow up themselves.
Donkey, you and I are in full agreement. Have you watched MTV lately? Or within the last several years? Have you listened to a rap lyric lately? Both MTV and rap music - as well as some R&B - is completely sexualized. I think the scary thing is that most adults don't realize that the world that is being presented by MTV and these lyrics is a world of *reality* for many PRE-TEENS. Pre-teens are being sexualized by the clothing, the music, and our culture at large. Girls especially are being objectified and the expectation is that young girls *should* be giving head and letting men use their bodies because that is the way it is. And the boys? They are learning that having a lot of girls and using them sexually is a cool thing to do. It makes them a man, according to that culture. Can you imagine!?!?! It used to be that a man was the one who stood up for one woman and earned a place of honor in the community by cherishing her and his children. Now, the place of honor goes to the pimp with the most ho's. Yeah, it's a scary world out there.
hmmmm... I have many thinkings on this topic, as you know, bunny. Hear, Hear!
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