My problem is one that few of you will appreciate. I simply have too much time on my hands. I know, I know. You hate me for even uttering the words. You who probably have a never-ending mental list of all the things you'd like to do or need to do if you ever got the time. But remember....this blog is not about you. So, back to me.
Yes, I have too much time on my hands. At first, I took up knitting because I could do that while turning a half-tuned ear and eye to the TV. Now every family member is sporting a scarf and hat duo with several more promised but not delivered. Alas, I have become disenchanted with knitting. Poor me.
Another hobby I've undertaken is sporadic hair cutting. I've been carving at my bangs for the last couple weeks or so, and they still fail to display the correct angle across my forehead. The bastards. As I'm sure you are already thinking, 'Surely that couldn't take up much time.' You would be correct.
Ray challenged me to write a novel, and since we finally replaced our computer, I started out with gusto and hilarity. My heroine is also a woman in search of a good hobby and often obtains hilarious results from her awkward attempts. It's a great seed of a story, but I moved on to about three books to read and forgot all about her. Strange, I know, but there's a story behind it. What happened is I needed to do two kinds of research right off the bat: dog grooming and stand up comedy. The dog grooming books were boring and the comedy book was hilarious, morphing to "hey, let's do some research and go to comedy night at Jacks." Goodbye, novel writing. But don't despair. I'll get back to it sooner or later.
A related hobby to the hair cutting has been alternating hair ratting and combing out tangles. The hair ratting often results in what I like to refer to as "alien head," especially in combination with a pony tail. For some visual assistance, channel Robin Mead on the Headline News morning show. Or just look to the right. But those tangles.....that's a whole other story.
Ok, I have two friends; Napolean and Josephine. They are often with me, although Napolean tends to visit with more frequency that Josephine. These two love-birds are the two columnar snarls that errupt nightly and daily, extending from my tender nape-of-neck to the ends of my hair. Luckily, I can brush over the surface and usually no one is the wiser. But, the compulsion to share the wonder that are my nape-snarls compels me to shout, "Chris, look at this one!" each time my wandering fingers alight upon a new abberation. And then I pout and whimper for ten minutes while I make laconic attempts to detangle. Here is a picture of Josephine who lives on the right side of my head.
Yes, this is what my life has evolved to. Me thinks I need a new hobby.
So.....I'm blogging again and I've been doing some on-line research (revised my ENTIRE Netflix queue) and I'm contemplating learning "Friend of the Devil" on the guitar (since I did print out the tabs) and I'm even going to take down my Christmas tree today. Oh, and I've been applying for jobs everyday. Blah blah blah!
Wouldn't you love to have my problems?
Oh, and here's a picture of the woman who almost fired me for writing a phone message on a post-it note. My audacity exceeds all reasonable tolerance!!!! But she likes me. She told Chris that if we hadn't worked together, we would have been great friends. She still hugs me at the block parties and sundry get-togethers. With friends like these....