Monday, February 20, 2006

Is dating "as friends" really an option?

Hellow, everyone, and welcome to another installment of...."As the Dating World Turns." Today we see our heroine struggling to decide whether to accept the invitation to a local benefit from a co-worker even if it is "as friends."

Alas, the heroine decided to go....

As her "date" was the best friend of the Chairman of her company, she was *mysteriously* told to take the mail and go home a half hour early on Friday. The boss-man surreptitiously signed her timecard for "5:00." Hmmm....very interesting, grasshopper.

As our heroine walked into her date's home, she was greeted with the strains of Vivaldi, a pleasant candlelight ambiance and slight smell of potpourri in his immaculate home. Apparently, he knows how to make his date feel welcome and appreciated. Score one for the date!

Said date goes by the name of Chris. Chris lives in a very nice little ranch house and surprisingly, decorated it all himself in a somewhat ornate and Victorian style. And more surprisingly, Chris turns out to be quite an artist. He has an amazing and gorgeous poster he worked on from 1977 until he finished it in 1998. In addition, he has several other portraits and drawings framed throughout his house. Very impressive.

Chris and our heroine joined two other couples at the local benefit for the local music programs at the public schools, of which our heroine's daughter is a direct beneficiary, being a viola player in the youth orchestra. The benefit, unfortunately, was filled with fuddy-duddies who did not either know how to appreciate or were unwilling to admit they appreciated the music offered. Even worse, the heroine was placed at a table at the very back of the ballroom, which prevented her from being able to watch the performers, which is her favorite part, other than the music and the dancing.

But NO ONE was dancing. The sticks up their anuses prevented them from moving too freely, you see. However, the music was really first-rate. There were two members of Verve Pipe performing, along with several very talented groups. One former member, something Van Arken, performed alone with his guitar playing only original stuff. Very EXCELLENT original stuff. And his wife also played (when she wasn't hoisting her very chubby little baby around on her hip), and had the earth-mother thing going on. Overall, quite disappointing for the heroine who would have genuinely loved every minute of it had she been able to sit up front and dance.

As the evening wore on, Chris morphed from the "as friend" date to the "wow, you're beautiful" date. Did you know I was the most attractive woman in the room? Did you know my eyes, my lips, my hands, my rings, my outfit was all mesmerizing? I was lucky to have a date that paid attention to those kinds of things. However, it was a little uncomfortable to me because he is strictly in the "just friends" box. He made it clear, however, that he wants to be more than just friends.

Poor Chris. Now we have to have the "let's take this slow" talk. Sigh.

So much for being "just friends."

24 comments:

Marcheline said...

Don't worry - he's gay.

- M

bunnyjo georg said...

LOL - that's what all his friends tease him about BUT this is a man's man: former football player, hugely avid hunter-fisher-rugby type. He actually borders on the arcane and vulgar. The artistic, Victorian side of him was a complete surprise. He likes flowers, he told me. Very interesting guy, but just waaaaay too touchy-feely-wow-your-amazing for me.

Roo said...

Well it sounded like things went well. A little to fast but well. You know it is possible that he does think you are beautiful and mesmerizing. I think he was trying. I think Chris should get a 2nd chance if he understands he needs to go slower.

bunnyjo georg said...

I don't doubt that I looked beautiful, and I know I can be quite mesmerizing. But I was really trying not to be. I will be treading very carefully with Chris. He just ended a long marriage, and is quite emotionally vulnerable. That's my biggest concern.

Bonnie Blithe said...

No dates or "friends" unless they've been divorced for at least a year. Otherwise, they still count as married. They need at least a year to "get it".

They're either still completely wrapped up in the ex, or feeling very naughty and adventurous about how much they're getting away with. They haven't yet realized that they are on their own and supposed to be all grown up now.

This has been proven by my extensive field research beyond a shadow of a doubt.

Bonnie Blithe said...

Can I just say one catty thing?

Ornate, Victorian, RANCH HOUSE???!!!???

bunnyjo georg said...

Oh, Miss B, you can be as catty as you want! I love you! Thank you for the big laugh. I agree (and trust your extensive field research!), I am going to have to put the kabosh to a very nice man's hope of mating with me. Sigh. Oh, and just so's everyone knows, this is NOT Dan. Dan would not be seen dead with facial hair unless it was his pork schlop side-burns.

shortensweet said...

Interesting. You have a not so bad date, but he's outta here, and I have a crappy date and can't seem to hurt his feelings. Maybe we should compare notes and try to learn from each other. Then again, my date also is moving way to fast, 'you're all I've ever wanted, you're the perfect girl for me.' so I just don't answer my phone when he calls :)

DCveR said...

You were matched!
Hehehehe
Some Leprechaun must have read your last post!
Careful with what you wish for Bunny Jo!!!

Chill Daddy said...

This guy sounds like a complete loser, the only thing that could possibly make it worse would be if he had a good income and no substance abuse isssues.

I don't get it.

So, you're wanting to date somebody who's NOT interested in you?

(would he be moving too fast if he'd had a crush on you for a long time, and his best buddy at work knew about it, and maybe told him, "go for it, dude, the worst she can do is say 'no'." -- cuz that's the kind of romantic advice 'dudes' give one another)

bunnyjo georg said...

Shorty: Actually, I think you and Chris would click big time. He's a little...ah...too something for me. I can't explain it, but I think you two would really hit it off.

DCvR: hee hee hee ;) I guess rather than Cupid, I've got a Leprechaun on my back - oh, great!

Chill: No chemistry. What can I say. shrug.

Chill Daddy said...

Oh, I see.

This must mean he's ugly.

More Jamie's type.

bunnyjo georg said...

Oh, shut up! Chris is not ugly, although I have to say he's not aged all that well. All those years of rough-and-tumble living. But he's got that rough side to him that just doesn't jive with my more refined sense of self, you know? Here's an example, k? He asked me to stay the night - as friends (hellow?!?), which I didn't, of course. So, the next morning when his friend called, he answered on speaker phone and said, "Hey, wait a minute. Laura, wake up." ha-ha-freaking-ha

shortensweet said...

um..wait..so you don't like the guy, yet you stayed the night???
No wonder there aren't any good guys left, they keep spending the night with woman who don't really like them and they waste there time on someone who doesn't give a hoot, rather than moving on.

Anonymous said...

yup, he's a looker.
I guess third input was out of the question?

bunnyjo georg said...

JAMIE! I most certainly did NOT stay the night! That was his idea of a joke he played on his friend! Geez, whadya think I am? You ought to know me a LOT better than that! Wow, I sound mad, don't I? I'm not mad, just shocked. So, re-read it with my *shocked* voice. ;)

Guyana-Gyal said...

Maybe it's 'cause, as you said earlier, you're not ready to fall in love. When a gal ain't, she just ain't, and no matter how many Mr. Rights she meets, he just ain't.

Im so angry, Im so at ease said...

What the hell is two members of "the verve pipe" doing on this thingey, even I got their "villains" album...

Im so angry, Im so at ease said...

Complients and a decent social setting is too easy, I'ld have ran away at once the cozy setting turned over into compliments, and I'm a guy...

Mom said...

I think he made quite an effort. After all, he didn't boil green beans and put them on a grubby tv tray, now did he? He took you to a fund raiser...and is not responsible for the fact some things about it sucked. I can see where you just might not have clicked, but compared to MANY guys out there (ask Jamie) he sounds like a prince and I think he gets a lot of points for trying. The smoochy stuff, well, that is for each individual person to decide for themselves. However, I am glad you fended him off, you did the right thing. I don't feel sorry for him either because he has the looks and has got a fairly impressive technique. He'll do all right. He just doesn't know what it takes to get and keep a bunnyjo. Um...what does it take? Just askin'.

Chill Daddy said...

Superpowers - mind-reading, super-strength, rhino-thick skin, and shapeshifting (to keep abreast of Bunny's preferences)

This is not a full list, mind you, these are the bare minimun - enough maybe to get a guy a second date.

bunnyjo georg said...

GG: Thank you. Exactly!

ISA: Well, guess what? The Verve Pipe is from here! Some of the members are from Grand Rapids, but the one guy Van Arken, graduated from Grand Haven, which is the little town I live in.

Mom: Without a doubt, Chris is a great guy, even if a little rough around the edges. He has a heart of gold. But, as GG says, if a girl ain't ready....

Chill: Thank you, I think you've got a great start on that list! :)Perhaps I will have to publish it as a warning to potential suitors... :)P

Anonymous said...

fire your fact checker. Brian Vander Ark (former lead singer of the Verve Pipe), hails from the thriving towm of Middleville,Mi.
I think he lives in GR now but resided in East Lansing for quite a while. Finally married at age 44, I think he met Lux, married her 3 weeks later, and had baby a couple weeks later. Fast worker!

bunnyjo georg said...

Anon, just discovered your comment. Great work on the *fact checking* but there's just one rule you must obey on bunnyjo's blog: if you are going to correct the almost-infallible bunnyjo, you must surrender your anonymity to do so. Zems ze rulez.